Tuesday, September 19, 2017

NOTHING BUT THE NIGHT (1975) **


Christopher Lee stars as a police inspector who is investigating a school bus accident.  Doctor Peter Cushing and his young colleague use hypnosis on a schoolgirl survivor to find out what she knows about the wreck.  After his protegee is found dead, Cushing and Lee team up to find the murderer. 

Nothing but the Night was the only feature made by Christopher Lee’s own production company, and by the looks of things, he was a better actor than producer.  Still, it’s worth watching because of the Lee/Cushing factor.  Other than that, there’s not a whole lot to recommend.  The opening sequence that chronicles the murder of three people is well done and the ending, while predictable is not without its strengths.  Too bad the movie drags its feet so much during the time in between. 

Whenever the two leads aren’t on screen, the film falters.  The stuff with the sexy reporter doing a story with the young girl’s prostitute mother (Diana Dors) eats up a lot of screen time and it doesn’t exactly captivate you either.  The scenes involving Dors running around the woods while trying to keep an eye on her daughter further bogs things down, but at least her eventual comeuppance is kind of cool. 

AKA:  The Devil’s Undead.  AKA:  Castle of the Living Dead.  AKA:  Devil Night.  AKA:  The Resurrection Syndicate. 

Thursday, September 7, 2017

CRAZY COUPLE (1979) **


Crazy Couple starts off promisingly enough.  It begins with our hero playing practical jokes back and forth with this creepy guy.  This weirdo decides to raise the stakes by swapping out our hero’s prescription with a laxative.  Little does he know the medicine was actually for his pet monkey.  The laxative is so strong that the monkey dies from it, which throws its owner into a Kung Fu frenzy. 

It’s here where I started to get excited.  I honestly thought the film was going to go into full-on Death Wish territory.  I mean, who wouldn’t love a movie in which a man tries to get revenge for his pet monkey?  Unfortunately, the two winds up joining forces to stop a Kung Fu master who has killed their doctor friend.   

So much for that.  From then on, the film turns into one of those lame Kung Fu comedies that feature so-so fight scenes and dumb humor.  The scenes that involve our hero trying to hook his buddy up with the doctor’s ugly daughter are the worst.  I did get a chuckle out of the scene in which a constipated Kung Fu master looks jealously over to the next stall while his assistant has no problem shitting.  (Complete with frequent “plop-splash” sound effects.)  If the film had one or two more of these amusing comic set pieces, it might’ve gotten a higher grade, but as it stands, Crazy Couple just wasn’t crazy enough for me to recommend it.

THE WILD WILD WORLD OF BATWOMAN (1966) ** ½


Batwoman (Katherine Victor) is a crimefighter who looks like one of the Golden Girls is all dressed up to go to an Eyes Wide Shut party.  Her arch-nemesis is a guy named Rat Fink who wears a fedora over top of his lucha libre mask.  When Rat Fink steals a top secret atomic hearing aid (it allows the user to listen in on any phone conversation) Batwoman and her all-girl army of bikini babes set out to recover it.

This is one of director Jerry Warren’s more coherent movies, if you can believe it.  Even then, there’s still inexplicable footage of The Mole People edited in for no good reason whatsoever.  I can’t say it’s as “good” as Teenage Zombies, but it’s about on par with Face of the Screaming Werewolf.

The shoestring budget, awful costumes, and bad performances lend the movie a certain amount of charm.  That’s not quite enough to sustain the entire running time, but it’s enough to make for an intermittently amusing flick.  Whenever things threaten to get dull, the scenes of scantily clad women go-go dancing help to maintain your interest.

There is at least one hilariously offensive sequence that is memorable.  That’s when Batwoman and some friends conduct a séance in order to find the whereabouts of Rat Fink.  During the séance, the voice of the spirit keeps getting interrupted by a spirit speaking Chinese.  It’s so wrongheaded and goofy that you just have to laugh.

AKA:  She Was a Hippy Vampire.  AKA:  The Wild World of Batwoman.  

Monday, September 4, 2017

MARVELOUS STUNTS OF KUNG FU (1979) **


Marvelous Stunts of Kung Fu, you say?  Well, I wouldn’t call them “Marvelous” or anything, but I guess they were okay.  Although the fight choreography is just so-so, the Kung Fu battles occur at regular intervals, so at least it never gets too boring.   

A deadly gang controls a small town and murder Kung Fu masters in rigged fights.  A traveler wanders into town and squares off against a crooked fortune teller who’s in cahoots with a sexy pickpocket.  Eventually, the trio decides to put their differences aside to take on the nefarious den of ruffians. 

Even though we don’t get any marvelous stunts or anything, the fight between the fortune teller and our hero is well done.  Too bad the rest of the fights are just ho-hum.  The finale, while jam packed with opponents, just doesn’t have the same sense of style.   

The most memorable fight happens right away in the opening scene.  That’s when the bad guys show off their “Golden Chicken” style.  In between shots of them punching and kicking, we see close-ups of a clucking chicken.  This scene is the comedic highlight of the film.  Unfortunately, the rest of the intentional humor fails to generate any laughs.  Maybe “Marvelous Chicken Kung Fu” would’ve been a more accurate title.  It certainly would’ve been a funnier one.

HUNT FOR THE WILDERPEOPLE (2016) ****


Writer/director Taika Waititi’s latest is a touching, sad, and hilarious little movie that is a wonderful showcase for Sam Neill.  He plays a cantankerous old bushman whose wife adopts a troubled overweight teenager (Julian Dennison).  When his wife dies, social services threaten to take the boy away.  Panicked, Dennison runs off into the bush and Neill has to track him down.  Through a series of misunderstandings, the authorities come to believe that Neill has kidnapped the boy and the pair decide to evade capture by living together in the woods. 

One of the joys of the movie is seeing Neill’s gruff exterior being slowly eroded by the charms of his newfound “nephew”.  Some of the best parts are the smaller scenes where the two of them are just sitting around talking.  He really makes you care about his character and his arc is genuinely moving.  If this isn’t his best performance, it’s awfully close.   

Waititi possesses a light, childlike touch that makes the film feel like a whimsical children’s movie.  His script is sharp and funny and it slides effortlessly from wacky sequences to more heartfelt moments without missing a beat.  It’s also packed with some great dialogue and plenty of laugh-out-loud zingers.  My favorite moment is when Dennison reads a wanted poster and says, “Caucasian?  Well, they got that wrong because you’re obviously white!”  

Saturday, September 2, 2017

DIRECT ACTION (2005) **


Dolph Lundgren stars as a cop who is breaking in a new partner, played by Polly Shannon.  Some of his colleagues learn that he is about to blow the whistle on their dirty dealings and they try to silence him.  Knowing he’s in constant danger, Dolph advises his new recruit to steer clear of him.  She of course sticks around long enough to save his bacon.  From then on, the duo tries to stay alive long enough to bring down the dirty cops. 

Directed and co-written by Sidney J. (Iron Eagle) Furie (who also directed Dolph in Detention), Direct Action is a by-the-numbers and uninspired vehicle.  The plot is standard-issue and the action is lackluster.  The biggest problem is the crummy camerawork that hampers many of the action scenes.  There’s a lot of jittery movements, unnecessary zooms, and awkward camera placements that undermine what could’ve been solid sequences.  The editing leaves something to be desired too. 

Direct Action (which shouldn’t be confused with the similarly-titled Dolph flick, Direct Contact) benefits from a strong performance by Dolph.  He has a reasonable amount of chemistry with Shannon, who does a fine job as his feisty, naïve partner.  While it’s far from Dolph’s worst, it never really distinguishes itself from the glut of actioners found in his filmography.   

I did like the scene where Dolph beats up a guy wearing a Punisher T-shirt.  He of course played The Punisher in the 1989 movie.  That’s about the only memorable part though.  Too bad there wasn’t a scene where he beats up a guy carrying a He-Man lunch box. 

AKA:  Black Scorpion.  

STRAY DOG (1949) ****


Toshiro Mifune stars as a rookie cop whose gun is stolen on a crowded trolley by a desperate thief during a heatwave.  He scours the underworld to find his piece and is disheartened to learn someone has been wounded with it.   Mifune then teams up with a more seasoned detective (Takashi Shimura) to find the thief before more people can be wounded and/or potentially killed by the gun.

Stray Dog feels like Akira Kurosawa’s version of an American film noir of the ‘40s.  The cinematography is moody and drenched in shadows, and the close-ups of the desperate, sweaty faces of the characters are effective.  Instead of relying on plot twists and hardboiled characterizations, Kurosawa is more interested in his characters’ feelings of guilt and obsession.  Mifune in particular is excellent as he frantically tries to get his gun back all the while feeling he’s the one to blame because of his carelessness. 

The opening that chronicles the loss of the gun is some of Kurosawa’s best work.  You’re immediately sucked in from the first frame.  Once Mifune and Shimura team up, the film starts to become something akin to a Buddy Cop movie, but even then, it’s more thoughtful and introspective than you’d expect.  The scene where Shimura lays out the differences between him and his inexperienced partner is one of the best in the entire picture. 

I also liked Kurosawa’s use of symbolism.  The heatwave that occurs during the investigation causes everyone to literally sweat it out while the search is on for the gun.  Once there is a break in the case, the heatwave gives way to a torrential downpour. 

The final act is electrifying.  There’s a tense encounter in a hotel that contains some of the most suspenseful work Kurosawa ever did.  The scene where Mifune must use his detective skills to pick out the thief in a crowded depot is equally intense.  Overall, this is one of Kurosawa’s best, which is really saying something.