Thursday, November 2, 2017

HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: THE CORPSE GRINDERS (1971) ***


Most people say Astro-Zombies is Ted V. Mikels’ best work, but I’d like to think this is his magnum opus.  The Corpse Grinders is 70 minutes of ‘70s silliness.  Imagine if Al Adamson tried to make an Andy Milligan movie and that might give you an idea of the lunacy in store. 

A doctor and his sexy nurse try to uncover why housecats are suddenly turning on their owners and killing them.  As it turns out, the proprietors of the Lotus Cat Food Company have been using corpses to enhance their cat food.  They soon take to using fresher ingredients (READ:  Living people) to increase their supply. 

The Corpse Grinders probably has too much plot for such a silly movie.  You have to follow the subplot of the doctor playing amateur detective along with the drama at the cat food plant, as well as the struggles of the gravedigger who supplies the company with fresh corpses.  That’s not even taking into account all the cat attacks that spice things up every now and then.  Even though the plot has a lot of moving parts, Mikels keeps the pacing running pretty smoothly. 

The shots of corpses and living people being put on the conveyor belt and fed to the industrial cat food machine are priceless.  The close-ups of the chewed-up meat spewing out of the machine are great too and I loved the not-so subliminal shots of the spinning wheels that are intercut over the potential victims’ faces.  The film probably needed a couple more cat attack scenes to fully make it a bona fide classic, but when you consider just how tough it is to get a cat to do anything, let alone act, it’s amazing we got as many as we did. 

Even if The Corpse Grinders is a decidedly low-rent affair, the cinematography makes it look like a million bucks.  The colorful lighting looks like something out of an Argento film.  I can’t say it’s a must-see or anything, but it definitely looks better than your typical schlock movie of the era. 

AKA:  Night of the Howling Beast.  AKA:  The Flesh Grinders.

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