Tuesday, July 9, 2024

LET’S GET PHYSICAL: LADY EMANUELLE (1989) ** ½

FORMAT:  DVD

Emanuelle (Malu) finds out her grandmother was none other than Lady Chatterley herself.  After reading granny’s diaries, it doesn’t take long for Emanuelle to become obsessed with her family legacy.  (Namely, fucking.)  She then asks a sexy writer named Leona (Micaela) to turn the diaries into a novel, much to the dismay of her asshole husband Michael (Gianni Macchia), who is anything but a romantic.  Tired of his overbearing ways, Emanuelle finds love with her writer friend who takes her on a journey of sexual discovery.  Together, they smoke a hookah and hookah up with a sexy Chinese babe, bang in a sauna, and torment her husband’s friend by forcing him to cross-dress.  Later, Leona makes her bang a bunch of dudes while she watches. Their relationship is soon threatened when Emanuelle falls in love with a younger man. 

Now, I know she isn’t really THE Emmanuelle (or even the fake Emanuelle), but the idea that Emanuelle is a descendent of Lady Chatterley is a nice enough hook to hang a fake Emanuelle Skinamax movie on.  Too bad it pretty much abandons the idea about halfway through.  It also got a little too plot-heavy for me near the end.  However, the abundance of skin makes it all go down rather smoothly. 

Most of this is fairly standard and straightforward stuff.  It also doesn’t help that many of the scenes early on tend to be a little rapey.  There is at least one amusing scene where Emanuelle and her gal pal are accosted on the beach by a roving gang of dirt bike-riding hooligans.  Also, the couplings are on the samey side as Emanuelle is either banging her hubby or Leona for the first two acts.  Luckily, once her lesbian lover makes her bang other dudes for fodder for her next book, things spice up a bit.  

Sure, there’s probably too much plot coming down the homestretch when the movie probably needed more humping, but it's mostly enjoyable.  On the plus side, we get a pretty funny scene where Leona seduces Emanuelle using a pair of chopsticks.  I can honestly say I have never seen that before in a Skinamax movie, so… ** ½. 

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