Look out, Tommy Wiseau. Watch your back, Neil Breen. There’s a new sheriff in town and her name is Belinda M. Wilson.
Black Mamba is one of the most delirious cinematic experiences I’ve had in my lifetime. That’s not hyperbole. That’s just a fact.
The film is basically a horror anthology with various characters coming to see the eponymous witch (Wilson) and asking her to make them potions so their wishes can come true. Naturally, they backfire on the poor saps in spectacularly hilarious ways. It sounds ordinary enough, but it’s Wilson’s completely nutzo handling of the material that makes the movie so special. If there’s a missing link between Fateful Findings and Black Devil Doll from Hell, this is it.
The first story is the best. It is a gleefully deranged tale of an infertile couple trying to conceive. I laughed so hard and long during some stretches of this sequence that I probably lost some vital bits of dialogue, but that’s okay. I plan on watching it again very soon. The conception scene is one for the books. It will have you splitting your sides in laughter. There are also moments here that are reminiscent of It’s Alive, Grave of the Vampire, and How to Train Your Dragon. No, I am not on drugs.
The next tale just can’t compete with the first, but it’s a really good/bad one any way you slice it. It centers on a woman who wants to look beautiful. The scenes of her holding a running commentary on the action (everyone in the movie seems to be incapable of having an interior monologue) are still really funny and the big bathtub scene is a winner too.
The third tale gets my vote for the second-best sequence. It’s about a guy who wants to swim with mermaids. The underwater CGI effects will have you busting a gut, but our hero’s antics and wisecracks are genuinely hilarious, and his scuba diving get-up is priceless.
Next, we have a story about a woman who wants a love potion to make her doctor fall in love with her. Things go horribly wrong when her husband accidentally drinks it. Like the second segment, this one is more of a traditional horror tale. However, nothing can prepare you for the confrontation between our heroine’s suitors. You’ll have to pick your jaw up off the floor.
For the final segment, we get to see what happened to the couple from the first story once they brought their monster baby home. I kind of wish it had been kept together as one long segment, but hey, that just adds to the overall unpredictable nature of the film.
The way Wilson uses shoddy CGI with reckless abandon is glorious. Some scenes look like people standing in front of a green screen while the Sims is playing in the background. In fact, there are some scenes that feature more effects going on in one single shot than most big budget Hollywood films. You’ve got to admire that fearless sense of ambition, especially when Wilson’s reach perpetually exceeds her grasp.
In short, this is a mind-blowing experience. For bad movie fans, Black Mamba will hit like a pure shot of adrenaline. This flick contains more WTF moments per minute than just about any I’ve seen. Connoisseurs of Grade Z cinema, the gauntlet has been thrown down. Check it out ASAP.
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