Jackie (Suit Li) is a hooker from China who moves in with her sister in Thailand. Before long, she gets Jackie a job turning tricks out of a nightclub. After witnessing a murder, Jackie becomes convinced she is jinxed. She consults a mystic who confirms she is cursed by misdeeds from a previous life. The only way to break the curse is to “adopt” a baby ghost, which means bring home a fetus, put it on an altar, and pray to it daily.
What do you know? It works. And soon, anyone who messes with Jackie has something dreadful happen to them. However, when she finds true love, our heroine becomes so busy she forgets to leave offerings to her ghost baby. Naturally, the supernatural tyke sets out to make her new man’s life a living Hell. He soon turns to his friend, a professor of the occult for help, which only makes things worse.
The scenes where the ghost protects Jackie from lecherous men are fun. It makes one perv slip on a banana peel like a goddamn cartoon character. Another dude pukes maggots. Then, a gangster rapist gets killed by his own zombie henchmen. Even with all this zaniness going on, the biggest laugh comes during a long nightclub scene where a lounge singer does a thoroughly mid version of Whitney Houston’s “The Greatest Love of All”.
Ghost Nursing isn’t perfect by a long shot. The scene with the mystic performing a ritual on a (real) dead monkey was a bit unnecessary. There’s also way too much slow motion in the third act and it suffers from an abrupt ending too. However, if you know what to expect from these anything-goes types of Chinese horror movies, you’ll probably enjoy it as much as I did. The electronic heavy score is quite good too and sounds like Goblin in some places.
Besides, Ghost Nursing features some shit I’ve never seen in a movie before, so for that, it gets a gold star. I mean, if you ever wanted to see an exorcism performed on a fetus, then this is your movie. If you’ve ever had a hankering to watch a crucifixion with a pair of flip flops, then move this to the front of your queue. Trust me, you’ll be glad you did.
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