Friday, August 31, 2018

DEATH WATCH (1982) ½ *


Romy Schneider stars as a woman slowly dying from a mysterious illness.  Harvey Keitel is a cameraman who gets a camera implanted in his eye and accepts the job of watching her die.  The footage is then broadcast to the masses and is a rating bonanza.

Which begs the question:  Would watching people slowly wasting away be considered must-see TV?  I mean what do the networks do for sweeps week?  Show footage of people sitting in the waiting room at the dentist?

With Death Watch, director Bertrand Tavernier anticipated the advent of reality TV.  That’s about the only thing he got right.  This is one tedious, slow moving, and heavy-handed movie.  He takes a semi-fantastic premise and does fuck-all with it.  While the set-up is admittedly intriguing, Tavernier’s lethargic pacing, coupled with a narrative curiously lacking in urgency is a recipe for one long, boring slog of a film.  

There’s a plot turn late in the game that involves Keitel going blind, which makes him unable to broadcast Schneider’s death.  The movie’s so bad that you almost wish YOU went blind shortly after the opening credits.  The other twist that occurs early in the third act is also predictable.  If it ended right then and there, it might’ve skated by with a One Star rating.  However, it keeps plugging along needlessly for another half-hour or so, adding to an already restless experience. 

Keitel is sorely miscast as the cameraman.  There’s one scene where he Keitels out while looking for a flashlight, but for the most part he barely registers.  There’s also zero chemistry between he and Schneider, which doesn’t help.  Her character grates on your nerves almost instantly and she does little to gain your sympathy. 

It’s hard to tell how all this played before reality TV was a thing.  One thing is for sure:  I’d rather watch that Kardashian crap or Survivor than ever see this again. The only bright spot is Harry Dean Stanton as an unscrupulous TV exec, but even his talents are frustratingly wasted in this dull, exasperating mess. 

AKA:  Death in Full View.

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

ESCAPE PLAN 2: HADES (2018) **


Escape Plan was a severely underrated latter-day Sylvester Stallone vehicle that not only gave us a proper Schwarzenegger and Stallone team-up but featured some of the duo’s best acting in years.  Because of that, I was excited when this sequel was announced.  Even though it went DTV without the benefit of Arnold, it does boast the participation of Dave Bautista.  Unfortunately, this Escape Plan is an undercooked and limp follow-up.  

Sly once again stars as “security expert” Ray Breslin.  When his team tries to extract a hostage, the plan goes south, and she winds up dead.  (“You trusted a computer more than your team and someone died!”)  Ray’s team member, Shu (Huang Xiaoming) becomes disillusioned after the incident and walks away from the business.  One year later, he gets arrested and is sent to a top-secret state of the art prison in which prisoners get into kickboxing matches in exchange for virtual reality seclusion.  It’s then up to Ray and the rest of his team to bust him out.

Even though Sly is given a reduced amount of screen time, he still equips himself nicely.  He doesn’t phone it in and his performance is easily the best thing about the movie.  For a good chunk of the running time, he appears as the voice inside Xiaoming’s head as he recalls Sly’s teachings in order to escape.  It’s a good way to make his presence felt, even if his screen time is scattershot.  

Bautista gets even less screen time, sadly.  He only shows up about every twenty minutes or so, which will definitely leave many fans wanting more.  He does get a good moment where he intimidates someone not with his muscles, but by quickly solving a Rubik’s Cube.  Unfortunately, these little moments of invention are fleeting.

Stallone and Bautista were also together in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 but didn’t have any screen time together.  Escape Plan 2 fixes that glaring error somewhat, even if the finished product is a misfire.  They do have a decent amount of chemistry together, enough to make you wish their next pairing will be in something a bit more reputable.  

50 Cent returns from the first film as Sly’s right-hand man, even if he isn’t particularly utilized all that well.  Jaimie King (who was also in director Steven C. Miller’s Silent Night) is similarly given little to do as another of Sly’s team members.  Titus Welliver is also wasted in the thinly written role of the warden.

As a fan of some of director Steven C. Miller’s DTV output, I had high hopes for this one.  There are a few weird moments here, like the robot nurses and the trio of bald, albino computer hackers, but not nearly enough to squeeze this one into the win column.  The action is also mediocre, and Stallone’s few fights and/or shootouts are underwhelming and forgettable.  It also doesn’t help that the CGI squibs, explosions, and muzzle flashes are incredibly cheap looking.

Also, it takes a good hour before Sly even gets sent to prison.  After that, he pretty much immediately figures out how to escape, which doesn’t leave a whole lot of room for suspense.  The gratuitous set-up for a sequel (which was filmed back to back with this) doesn’t hold a lot of promise either.

THE BOUNTY HUNTER (1989) ** ½


The Exterminator himself, Robert Ginty co-wrote, directed, and stars as the title character.  He moseys into a small town looking for a bounty and winds up butting heads with the sheriff (Bo Hopkins).  Naturally, the sheriff runs the town with an iron fist and is trying to push the Native American population out in order to get a big oil company to set up camp there.  Little does he know Ginty has an ulterior motive for being there:  Getting revenge for his fallen Nam vet Native American buddy.  I don’t think I’m spoiling anything when I tell you Hopkins was the man responsible for his death.  

Is The Bounty Hunter a good movie?  Not exactly.  It did however, give Robert Ginty a chance to direct and write and star in his own vehicle.  I mean no one was beating down his door for an Exterminator 3, so he might as well hone his chops behind the scenes.  (Although this was released in some countries as Exterminator 3, but never mind.)

There are no surprises here whatsoever, but it is fun seeing Ginty matching wits with Hopkins.  Since they are two of my all-time favorite B movie vets, I got a moderate amount of amusement from it.  Ginty commands the screen with his marble-mouthed charisma and sleepy-eyed screen presence.  I know this is Hopkins’ umpteenth turn as a seemingly simpleminded but sinister sheriff.  However, he finds new ways to keep his familiar-seeming character feel fresh.  (He has a good monologue about his family losing their home in the Depression, as well as a memorable bit where he sings “Camp Town Races” while beating up a suspect.)

The Bounty Hunter is decent enough for the most part.  Sure, it runs out of steam towards the end, but it’s watchable more often than not.  Since I’m a fan of both leads, I probably gave it an extra Half Star than necessary.  Your mileage may vary.

AKA:  Exterminator 3.

BLOWBACK (2000) **


Mario Van Peebles is a cop who puts away a serial killer (James Remar) who likes to crucify women upside with a nail gun.  Remar is executed but is revived in a mad scientist lab ran by the CIA, who turn him into a brainwashed assassin.  The strong-willed killer rejects their mind-control conditioning and goes after the jury who convicted him.  He murders them one by one, leaving their bodies posed in the ways inspired by martyred saints with Bible verses shoved in their mouths.  It’s then up to Van Peebles to take him down.

When Blowback was released, the DTV market was still riding high on the wave of serial killer thrillers inspired by Seven.  As far as these things go, it’s not bad.  The opening scenes are appropriately bonkers, which had me hoping that this was going to be some sort of minor cult classic.  Unfortunately, it becomes frustratingly more conventional (not to mention boring) as it goes along.  Director Mark L. (Showdown in Little Tokyo) Lester’s handling of the WTF first act is inspired.  However, the rest of the film is strictly by the numbers.     

The participation of Remar and Van Peebles helps keep your interest, even while the film begins circling the drain.  Remar in particular looks like he’s having a blast playing the sleazy serial killer.  He chews the scenery admirably while going into his crazy character’s religious diatribes.  Van Peebles carries the movie as far as it will go with his considerable charisma.  He also gets the best line of the movie when he says, “He’s one taco short of a combo platter!” and even gets to make a funny New Jack City in-joke.

AKA:  Crossing.

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

PRIVATE PROPERTY (1960) ***


Corey Allen and Warren Oates star as two drifters who in the opening scene accost a gas station attendant for some orange soda.  Oates is getting itchy for the company of a woman, and Allen assures him he can get him one.  They follow Kate Manx home and sneak into the abandoned house next door where they spy on her while she swims in the pool.  When her husband leaves town, Corey goes over to warm her up a little.  Naturally, they wind up falling for one another, which makes Oates jealous and ultimately leads to murder.

Written and directed by Leslie (Incubus) Stevens, Private Property is a low-key, low-budget thriller that benefits from a trio of fine performances and an increasing sense of dread.  We know right off the bat what Allen and Oates are capable of, and the way Allen toys with Manx is quite captivating.  The fact that she is bored and seeking a little bit of danger creates a perfect storm that sets up the tragic ending.  (I especially liked the scene where Allen leaves his belt behind and Manx begins wearing it around her neck like a collar.)

Allen and Oates are both excellent and some of the best scenes in the movie play like a deranged version of Of Mice and Men.  They inhabit their despicable characters with such ease that it might remind you of Michael Rooker in Henry:  Portrait of a Serial Killer.  Manx is equally fine as the lonely housewife torn between her isolated existence and the allure of danger.

If the film has a flaw, it’s that it’s more interesting during its slow-burn early sections than in the finale.  Stevens offers up plenty of atmosphere throughout the picture, but the confrontation between Oates and Allen, though inevitable, curiously falls a little flat.  That’s not enough to derail Private Property, which remains a solidly engaging character-driven noir, even if it does sort of fizzle out near the end.

Monday, August 27, 2018

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE: FALLOUT (2018) ***


I know I’m a little late to the party with Mission:  Impossible:  Fallout, but sometimes life gets in the way.  Luckily, I was able to finally check it out on a lazy Sunday.  I had high hopes since I dug writer/director Christopher McQuarrie’s last effort in the series, Rogue Nation.  Maybe my expectations were a tad lofty, especially with so many people touting this one as one of the best in the series.  While it lacks the crackerjack precision of Jack Reacher or the flat-out fun of Rogue Nation, it remains a solid Tom Cruise adventure.  There were plenty of stunts and thrills to make for a suitably entertaining late-summer afternoon.  I can’t say it’s a high-octane action flick, but there’s certainly a sufficient amount of octane to go around. 

The plot is another one of those “recover stolen plutonium to prevent terrorists from threatening the world” deals.  The overly familiar plot coupled with McQuarrie’s decision to downplay some of the danger kind of adds to the overall feeling of déjà vu.  (There’s a moment where Cruise rides his motorcycle against traffic during a chase scene that arrives with very little fanfare; almost as if it’s just another day at the office for him.)  Even the much-talked about Halo jump scene falls (no pun intended) a little flat.

Having said that, McQuarrie does deliver a handful of crisply filmed and edited action scenes.  There’s a driving scene that’s similar to Jack Reacher, a great show-stopping bathroom brawl, and the helicopter chase that caps off the movie is a lot of fun.  Fallout also features what is arguably the best Running Tom Cruise scenes of all time, so it has that going for it.

It was in this scene in which Cruise famously broke his ankle while jumping from building to building.  I for one have enjoyed seeing his transformation from pretty boy movie star to the heir apparent to Jackie Chan, risking bodily harm by doing his own stunts in an effort to entertain audiences worldwide.  On the acting side of things, he’s as dependable as ever.  Cruise once again delivers an engaging performance and has a good rapport with new team member Henry Cavill (who after this film and The Man from U.N.C.L.E. has the market cornered on big screen revivals of ‘60s small screen spy shows).

One spoilery type thing to note:  It seems that the more Michelle Monaghan is in a Mission:  Impossible movie, the less I like it.  That’s not a knock on her performance at all, as she’s as fine here as she’s always been.  It’s just that the series has never really figured out what to do with her, aside from being a target for Cruise’s enemies.

While the film lacks the kinetic energy of the first film and the bonkers mentality of the second, it is nevertheless a worthy entry in the series.  Even if McQuarrie fails to top himself from the previous entry, I admire the way he relishes tossing in more perils for Cruise to juggle as the film goes along.  This marked the first time in the franchise in which a filmmaker directed more than one entry.  Maybe that accounts for some of the been-there-done-that feeling.  If the box office is any indication, Cruise will be back doing his impossible missionary work sooner than later.  Maybe next time though, they can bring in a new director to put a fresh spin on the series.

Wednesday, August 22, 2018

WARLOCK: THE END OF INNOCENCE (1999) * ½


Julian Sands couldn’t be lured back for the third entry in the Warlock franchise, but we have Bruce Payne in his place.  He memorably played the slimy villain in Passenger 57, which made me hopeful that this wouldn’t completely suck.  We also have the lovely Ashley Laurence from the Hellraiser series onboard as the fetching Final Girl.  However, neither of them can bring much life into this unnecessary and forgettable sequel.

Laurence stars as an adopted college student who gets a mysterious invitation to visit her birth parents’ ancestral home.  (Her boyfriend says, “Only you would get a call at 7:00 AM from a historian!”)  For much of the first act, Laurence walks around the empty house in a flimsy negligee with a slightly confused look on her face.  A little later, her friends show up to keep her company.  The evil Warlock (Payne) also appears posing as an architect and tries to turn Laurence’s friends against her in order to fulfill an ancient curse. 

Warlock:  The End of Innocence is a slow moving and frustrating sequel.  Not much happens during the ninety-four-minute running time and the creepy house location wears out its welcome fast.  Director Eric Freiser does little to make the house interesting or scary, which is odd since he does a good job early on during the dorm room scenes.  I liked the long camera take that goes down the hall room to room exploiting the kinky goings-on in the dorm.  Since this scene also serves as our introduction to the characters, it’s quite economical.  Too bad this sort of precision is sorely lacking elsewhere in the film.

It doesn’t help that the Warlock spends most of his time talking to our characters to gain their trust before messing with their minds.  Payne’s performance is missing the panache Julian Sands brought to the role, but in his defense, Sands was given much better scripts to work with.  Laurence is good though and her performance is the best thing about the movie. 

The film might’ve skated by with Two Stars if the death scenes weren’t so uninspired (there’s death by fire and freezing).  Although there’s a decent throat slashing scene, the bulk of the kills are disappointing.  There is a potentially cool torture dungeon scene that plays like a mix of Hellraiser and Cannibal Ferox, but it’s way too brief to have much of an impact.  The lame finale helped assure that The End of Innocence was the end of the road for the franchise.