Although the
SuicideGirls movies are never all that great, I still continue to check them
out, mostly because they remind me of those old Centerfold shoots you’d use to
see on The Playboy Channel (except with a lot more tattoos and piercings). There’s something to be said for a film
franchise that is nothing more than a series of interludes where women disrobe
in front of the camera, occasionally interrupted by dull getting-to-know-you
shit. This isn’t the greatest
SuicideGirls flick, but it is the latest, so that counts for something.
The whole “premise”
(and I use that term loosely) is that the SuicideGirls website has become old
and outdated. Because of that, the
people in charge want to relaunch the website.
In order to do so, they have to come up with a lot of new content. That’s where the endless scenes of tattooed
trollops disrobing come in.
The stripping scenes themselves
are hit-and-miss. The good news is that
even if there is a sequence that doesn’t work, there’s another one nipping
close behind. The best sequence features
Quinne, a busty babe who does a poolside striptease while all her friends chill
out in the background. She definitely
has a way with the camera and her coy innocence is a nice compliment to her
overabundance of tattoos. I also dug the
scene of two bikini babes having a topless water gun fight. Some of the music during the stripteases is a
tad annoying, but hey, that’s why the MUTE button was invented.
I could’ve done
without all scenes of the girls brainstorming new ideas for photo shoots,
publicity stunts, and merchandising.
Many of these scenes feel phony and and/or over-rehearsed. Since they’re nothing more than filler, these
interludes make for a perfect place to go get a sandwich, grab a beer, or fold
some laundry. Trust me, you won’t miss
anything.
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