MURDER ON THE EMERALD SEAS (1974) ** ½

Sherwood Gates (Roberts Blossom) is an eccentric millionaire who holds an annual beauty pageant.  Unfortunately, a killer has been picking off the pageant winners for the past three years.  In an effort to discourage the killer, Gates moves the next pageant aboard a luxurious ocean liner.  The chief (Frank Logan) remains skeptical and sets out to nab the murderer by convincing a boyishly handsome detective (Robert Perault) to go undercover dressed in drag as one of the contestants. 

Murder on the Emerald Seas was directed by the great Alan Ormsby the same year he made the classic Deranged.  If you’re a fan of Ormsby’s work, you’ll enjoy spotting many of the familiar faces that appear in his other films.  There’s also cameo appearances by Henny Youngman and Johnny Weissmuller too, which are more random than anything.

Ormsby’s approach seems to be throw anything against the wall and see if it sticks.  There are comic cartoon title cards, visual representations of old (bad) jokes, and there are even moments that borrow shamelessly from the Keystone Kops.  The broad comedy often falls flat, but the healthy doses of nudity assure that you’ll never be bored.  

The scenes that hew close to a straight-up slasher work.  I liked the part where the killer (dressed in a clown costume) chases a nude body painting model through the ship while Dixieland jazz plays, as well as the Psycho homage.  As uneven as all this is, it shouldn’t be a surprise that Murder on the Emerald Seas never really comes together in the end.  What is surprising is that the film treats its gay and/or female impersonator characters in a (mostly) respectful manner, so it comes off feeling (slightly) more progressive that many of its contemporaries.  

AKA:  The Great Masquerade.  AKA:  The AC/DC Caper.