HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: GHOST WRITER (1989) **

Audrey Landers stars as an entertainment journalist who is unhappy turning out fluff pieces.  When her apartment is being renovated, she moves into a secluded beach house where a beautiful movie star (Judy Landers) died under mysterious circumstances.  Judy’s ghost now haunts the house, leaving typewritten notes to prove her existence.  (GET IT?  GHOST WRITER?)  After she reveals herself, Audrey thinks it’s the perfect opportunity to jumpstart her career by landing an interview with a ghost.  Naturally, the politician (Anthony Franciosa) responsible for Judy’s death wants to silence them both.

If you don’t remember who the Landers sisters are, I can barely one-up you.  I do remember them, but only for their appearances on game shows like Match Game and the $25,000 Pyramid back when I was a kid.  Beyond that, I couldn’t tell you without looking at IMDb why the hell they were even famous in the first place.  However, they were famous enough to land the starring roles in a Kenneth J. Hall movie!

The first thing you should probably know about Ghost Writer is than unlike Hall’s Evil Spawn and Linnea Quigley’s Horror Workout, it’s strictly PG stuff.  Because of that, there’s no nudity, and the jokes are thoroughly lame.  That said, it’s not exactly a chore to sit through, thanks to the supporting cast that includes David (Charlie’s Angels) Doyle, Jeff (Taxi) Conaway, Joey (Amazon Women on the Moon) Travolta, John (The Goonies) Matuszak,  Dick (Gremlins) Miller, Kenneth (The Thing from Another World) Tobey, and the one and only (okay, two and only) Barbarian Brothers!

Audrey is a capable leading lady, but Judy handily steals every scene she’s in as the Marilyn-inspired starlet.  She has a memorable bit where she becomes visible to perform a striptease in a nightclub.  Again, since it’s PG, nothing is shown (which is odd when you consider it’s produced by David DeCoteau).  

It’s not really a horror movie, but there is a pretty cool finale set in a wax museum where Judy becomes part of the displays and freaks out Tony.  She takes the form of a vampire, the Bride of Frankenstein, and most inspired of all, Regan from The Exorcist.  Although it’s allegedly a comedy, there’s no real laughs to be had.  Still, if you ever wanted to see Jeff Conaway fight The Barbarian Brothers, here’s your chance. 

You have to actually feel sorry for poor Conaway.  One decade, you’re working alongside John Travolta in Grease.  The next, you’re starring alongside Joey Travolta in this.