Tuesday, November 12, 2019

WHAM BAM THANK YOU SPACEMAN (1975) **


William A. (Blackenstein) Levey directed this silly softcore sci-fi sex comedy.  Two aliens named Sergeant Jerkoff and Private Asshole come down to Earth to find women to help them propagate the species.  Whenever they spy on couples making love, they beam the women up to their ship just as they’re about to achieve orgasm and impregnate them with their lizard tongues.  Their first stop is Hollywood, where they visit a house of ill repute and get it on with a hooker played by Ilsa herself, Dyanne Thorne.  Other couples are found necking on Lovers Lane, on a movie set, and in a sheik’s harem.  
If you thought Blackenstein looked cheap, wait till you see this.  The costumes and sets are terrible, and the aliens’ masks are lame.  It is amusing to see unsuspecting tourists’ reactions to the aliens walking past the porno shops on Hollywood Boulevard though.  

Sheltered 21st century viewers are likely to have a conniption during the extended, unfunny jokes made at the expense of gays.  I mean, I hate political correctness and all, but just having dudes in chintzy alien costumes dropping slurs won’t garner any laughs from anyone.  In fact, most of the aliens’ dialogue is flat-out dumb.  (“Finger-lickin’ good!”)  The only laughs come from the breathless, satisfied Earth women who say the title after the aliens have their way with them.

All this wouldn’t matter if the sex scenes were any good.  As it stands, the film features the standard issue bumping and grinding you’d expect from a cheap sexploitation picture.  Nothing more, nothing less.  (There’s also a XXX version that awkwardly inserts hardcore footage into the action.)  It’s always fun seeing Thorne on screen, and Russ Meyer starlet Haji appears briefly as a harem girl, but even their enormous talents can’t save this one.

AKA:  Erotic Encounters of the Best Kind.  AKA:  Erotic Encounters of the Fourth Kind.  

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