The new kid in school (Omri Katz) doesn’t give a shit about local legends and warnings, so he goes into the town’s haunted house, lights a forbidden candle, and brings about the return of a trio of witches (Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Kathy Najimi) who were hung for kidnapping children during the Salem Witch Trials. They then set out to suck out all the souls of the kids, in town starting with our hero’s little sister (Thora Birch). He then teams up with a talking cat and the most popular girl in school (Ladybugs’ Vinessa Shaw) to stop the witches and save his sister.
Hocus Pocus is a dumb kids movie, which is fine. I am not the target audience for this sort of thing. I’m just saying a dumb kids movie would’ve been infinitely more tolerable if it wasn’t for the constant mugging of the three witches, all of whom are pretty annoying. Bette hams it up to almost embarrassing levels. Kajimy and Parker are basically just there to repeat each other’s lines or finish each other’s sentences, which gets on your nerves in a hurry. It also doesn’t help that Bette sings a terrible rendition of “I Put a Spell on You” (it must’ve been a contractual obligation) and Parker does half a number while casting a spell.
There is, however, one legitimately weird and creepy scene when the talking cat gets ran over and flattened by a car. Since it’s immortal, its bones break back into place and he comes back to life. Another memorable part is the running gag when they keep referring to Katz as a “virgin”, not something you’d expect in a Disney movie.
Sleepwalkers’ Mick Garris co-wrote and co-produced, which maybe explains why some of this threatens to work at times, but for the most part, Hocus Pocus is kinda bogus.
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