A failed screenwriter is tired of playing the Hollywood game, so he and his girlfriend decide to shoot their own independent feature, Virgin Cheerleaders in Chains. Once they finally are able to raise money for their movie, they venture to a rundown house in the middle of nowhere to begin filming. Little do they know the owners of the house are deranged snuff movie-making killers who are all too eager to cut the filmmakers to ribbons.
This is one of those frustrating bait and switch numbers as the title refers to the movie within the movie. It’s almost as if the filmmakers are rubbing our noses in the fact that we wanted to see a movie called Virgin Cheerleaders in Chains in the first place. Then again, that’s always been the name of the game in exploitation filmmaking. Lure the suckers in with a terrific title. It doesn’t matter if the film lives up to it or not. As long as you get their money. (I fooled them. I streamed it for free on Fawesome.)
It doesn’t help that the bulk of the film is primarily about the ups and downs of low budget independent filmmaking. We see the characters try to write the script, crowdsource the budget, and call in favors to get their dream project off the ground. The problem is it isn’t entertaining, funny, or insightful, and the whole “meta” approach falls flat and isn’t very clever. Plus, the interview segments that play like DVD bonus features are kind of useless too.
The film also drags its feet getting to the “real” horror (as opposed to the “reel” horror). Sadly. It just isn’t worth the wait. There is some OK gore here. We get severed fingers and heads, but it’s really nothing to make it all worthwhile. Besides, most of this is completely nullified by the lame twist ending.
AKA: Cheerleader Horror Movie.
