LET’S GET PHYSICAL: THE HARRYHAUSEN CHRONICLES (1998) *** ½

FORMAT:  DVD

This hour-long television special narrated by Leonard Nimoy tells us of the life and artistic creations of one of the most renowned special effects men of all time, Ray Harryhausen.  When Ray sees King Kong as a teen, he makes it his life’s mission to become a stop-motion special effects artist.  After serving in WWII, he comes home and begins work on a series of children’s shorts.  Eventually, he gets the call of a lifetime to work under his idol, Willis O’Brien on Mighty Joe Young.  From there, he goes on to create memorable creatures for The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms, It Came from Beneath the Sea, Earth vs. the Flying Saucers, 20 Million Miles to Earth, The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad, The 3 Worlds of Gulliver, Mysterious island, and many more. 

Written and directed by Time magazine film critic Richard Schickel, The Harryhausen Chronicles offers a treasure trove of material for fans of the legendary effects man.  The coolest parts are of Harryhausen in his studio presiding over and manipulating some of his most famous creations for the camera.  There’s a lot of great clips from the films too.  From the Ymir in 20 Million Miles to Earth to the Cyclops in The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad to the skeleton army of Jason and the Argonauts to the Medusa in Clash of the Titans, they’re all here.  Not only that. but we also get to see his early stop-motion attempts as a young man and test footage from projects that never got off the ground for one reason or another. 

Harryhausen is gracious and warm in the interview segments and offers plenty of behind-the-scenes info on his films.  We also hear from his pal Ray Bradbury (who also wrote Beast) and Harryhausen’s business partner Charles H. Schneer who produced many of his movies.  Fans like Dennis Muren, Henry Selick, and George Lucas are on hand as well as they gush about their love of his work and how it shaped them.  It’s also cool seeing Bradbury handing Harryhausen his honorary Oscar and hearing the ceremony’s host, Tom Hanks talking about his love for Jason and the Argonauts. 

In short, anyone who’s ever been fascinated by the awe-inspired work of Ray Harryhausen owes it to themselves to check this documentary out. 

YACHT ROCK: A DOCKUMENTARY (2024) ***

Yacht Rock is one of those love-it-or-hate-it genres.  There are so many songs that fall under the banner that are excruciating to listen to for me.  However, when you do hear that handful of bangers from the genre, you just have no choice but to sing along.  This documentary (or “dockumentary”, if you will) is a fun look at the Yacht Rock phenomenon.  It keeps things light (although it refuses to put its tongue firmly in cheek) while simultaneously giving all the artists involved their due (even if critics and music snobs refuse to). 

The filmmakers talk to all the giants of the genre.  We get interviews with Michael McDonald, Christopher Cross, Kenny Loggins, the members of Toto, and more.  What we learn is that the genre more or less sprung out organically as many artists knew one another and played either as session musicians or guests on each other’s albums.  (Most of the artists just saw themselves as a new generation of session musicians a la The Wrecking Crew.)  This sort of crosspollination is the reason why so many of the songs sounded so similar and gave the genre its distinct sound. 

The film charts the beginning of the Yacht Rock movement with McDonald joining The Doobie Brothers.  His addition to the line-up caused sort of a changing of the guard as the band transitioned from hippie rock to more of a jazzy lite rock sound.   Other highlights are McDonald’s duet with Loggins, Steely Dan’s Aja album, and Cross’s smash debut.  While the music dominates airwaves and wins countless awards, the death knell sounds with the advent of MTV.  Fortunately, gangster rappers come to the genre’s rescue when they sample some of the best bits for their songs.  (Most notably, McDonald’s “I Keep Forgetting” for Warren G.’s “Regulate”.)  In doing so, it gives the genre a second life.  Later, a web series coins the “Yacht Rock” term, and that, coupled with music lovers’ nostalgia, creates a monster.

It’s funny seeing who does and doesn’t embrace the title of “Yacht Rock”.  (Steely Dan’s Donald Fagen’s refusal to be interviewed provides the film with its biggest laugh.)  The interviews are mostly entertaining and some of their anecdotes are amusing.  Overall, like the songs from the genre itself, Yacht Rock:  A Dockumentary is fun and breezy and a tad forgettable. 

MITCH APPEARS ON THE DTVC PODCAST!

Mitch once again was a guest on the DTVC Podcast with host, Matt Poirer.  On this episode they discussed the Christmas horror classic, Silent Night, Deadly Night (and of course, Mitch made room to talk about his favorite Christmas horror flick, ELVES!).  Give it a listen here: DTVC Podcast 188, "Silent Night, Deadly Night" by DTVC Podcast

LET’S GET PHYSICAL: MERMAIDS OF SAND, SEA, AND SURF (1994) ** ½

FORMAT:  DVD

Mermaid Movies were a low budget version of Playboy Video Centerfolds.  They featured sexy topless women posing in picturesque exotic locales and… well… that’s about it.  They might not have had the same kind of money Hugh Hefner and his team were working with, but they had enough of it to convince the models to take their tops off, and at the end of the day, that’s all that really matters now, doesn’t it?

The first segment is called “Spanish Maiden” (***) and it features Belinda, a buxom brunette beauty posing topless on and around a beachfront pier.  This sequence is solid for the most part.  It’s just the heavily purple-tinted portion detracts from the scenery.  And by “scenery”, I mean the “topless Spanish maiden”. 

In “Enchantress” (** ½), a blonde named Lisa takes it all off and writhes around inside a small tropical treehouse.  This would’ve been just dandy had it not been for the annoying narrator performing some sort of half-assed nursery rhyme over the action. 

Next is “Artistic Charm” (** ½).  Ingrid, another sexy brunette, shows off on the pier before lounging topless in a hammock.  This too suffers from pointless nursery rhyme shit, but thankfully the narrator limits his lyrics to only a few verses. 

“Sensuous Castaways” (***) follows.  Lisa and her friend Kelley hang out on top of old boat wrecks on a desert island.  This scene is nice because it has two gals to look at, both of whom look great against the boat backdrops.  The fact that Lisa is the one doing the nursery rhyme narration helps too. 

Kelley is the star of the next sequence appropriately titled “Kelley” (** ½) where she does a tasteful series of poses on the beach.  “Lori” (** ½) follows her, posing topless on a small wooden bridge, in a little creek, and along the shoreline. 

“Tropical Heat Wave” (** ½) features two models writhing around in the sand and surf before cooling off in a pool.  This one has too much cutting back and forth to be effective, but at least the narration is decent this time.  “No men allowed! This is a woman’s world!”

The final segment is “Surf’s Up” (** ½) where models pose (where else?) on the beach.  This feels like outtakes from another Mermaids videos, but it’s hard to tell.  The models look hot, which is all that really matters. 

This isn’t too bad overall.  The biggest problem is the unnecessary narrator who talks over the scenes of the models posing.  Even worse is when he shills for other Mermaid releases in between the nude scenes.  His nursery rhyme shtick is grating too.  That’s probably the only real drawback though.  So, if you decide to watch this on mute and supply your own soundtrack, add a Half-Star to the rating. 

LET’S GET PHYSICAL: CHEEZY ADVENTURE TRAILERS (2007) **

FORMAT:  DVD

Everywhere you look, from the DVD case to the Amazon listing to the DVD menu calls this “Cheezy Action Trailers”, but the actual onscreen title is Cheezy Adventure Trailers.  I have to say, that title makes a lot more sense once you see what movies are actually featured.  When I think of “action”, I think of Enter the Dragon, Die Hard, and Lethal Weapon.  Shit like that.  Cheezy Action… excuse me… Adventure Trailers contains previews for films such as Mogambo, King Solomon’s Mines, and Hatari!  These kinds of flicks would most undoubtedly fall under the heading of “adventure” and not necessarily be regarded as “action”. 

Why the switcheroo with the title?  Who knows.  This is Cheezy Flicks we’re talking about here.  This is the same company that puts out trailer compilations that feature the same trailers within the same collection.  And in true Cheezy fashion, many of the trailers are in rough shape.  The majority of the trailers are faded and worn, and the prints for Morgan the Pirate, Sandakan the Great, and Jungle Gold are extremely jumpy. 

There are some fun bits to be sure.  The Journey to the Lost City trailer features a gold statue with humongous boobs.  There’s a couple of trailers with an exploitation edge like Naked Africa, Man from Deep River, and Nature Girl and the Slaver, but not too many.  Trailers like these make it worth sitting through, but unless you’re a die-hard trailer compilation connoisseur like me, this one will be easy to skip over. 

I can say it delivers on the Cheezy Adventure Trailers.  I can’t fault it for that.  If you like jungle pictures and Tarzan movies, this will fit the bill.  (“Jungle Movie Trailers” would’ve been an even better title now that I think of it.)  However, if you go into this expecting some Cheezy action trailers, you are bound to be disappointed.  Luckily, it’s less than an hour long, so it all goes down pretty smooth, all things considered.  Just know what you’re getting yourself into beforehand and be wary of the bait and switch title, and you should be okay. 

The full trailer list includes:  Morgan the Pirate, Journey to the Lost City, Sandakan the Great, Sword of Sherwood Forest, Safari Drums, Jungle Flight, Hell on Devil’s Island, Mogambo, Tropic Zone, King Solomon’s Mines, Tarzan’s Fight for Life, Jungle Heat, Jungle Gold, Naked Africa, Man from Deep River, She Gods of Shark Reef, Tarzan and the Great River, Tarzan’s Greatest Adventure, Virgin Sacrifice, Watusi, Walk into Hell, Nature Girl and the Slaver, Manhunt in the African Jungles, Jungle Attack, Perils of Nyoka, Hatari!, Two Sane Nuts, Tarzan Goes to India, Zulu, and The Brigand of Kandahar. 

AKA: Cheezy Action.  AKA:  Cheezy Action Trailers. 

LET’S GET PHYSICAL: ONLY THE GOOD PARTS VOLUME 2 (2022) ****

FORMAT:  DVD

The second installment of trailer goodness tops its predecessor in nearly every department.  It’s a fantastic medley of (mostly) horror trailers but with enough pinches of sexploitation and oddball titles to keep things interesting.  It’s without a doubt one of the best trailer compilations I’ve seen in a while. 

What I loved about this collection is that many of the trailers were grouped according to loosely related themes.  Things kick off with trailers for films about sexy vampire seductresses like Vampyres, The Vampire Lovers, and Lust for a Vampire.  (“Welcome to the finishing school where they really do finish you!”)  From there, we pivot to mad scientist movies (Blackenstein, The Incredible 2-Headed Transplant, and Night of the Bloody Apes), horror flicks about nerds getting revenge on bullies (Horror High and Evilspeak), flicks about hairy monsters (Uninvited, The Werewolf and the Yeti, and Night of the Demon), and some good old-fashioned ‘80s horror (The Slayer, One Dark Night, and Mutant). 

There are some great taglines along the way.  A few of my favorites were for In Search of Dracula (“Yes Virginia, there really was a Dracula!”), House by the Cemetery (“You’ll have to mortgage your LIFE!”), and Bloodsucking Freaks (“The show that will make anyone retch!").  The best part is the awesome run of trailers for movies with the word “Don’t” in the title, including Don’t Look in the Basement, Don’t Open the Door, Don’t Open the Window, Don’t Go in the House, Don’t Answer the Phone, and Don’t Look Now. 

Even though it was only seventy-one minutes, I kind of wish it was longer.  Then again, so many of these things overstay their welcome.  I guess you have to tip your hat to the trailer compilations that know how to quit while they’re ahead.  In short, Only the Good Parts Volume 2 leaves you wanting more, but in the best way possible. 

Here’s the complete trailer rundown:  Vampyres, The Vampire Lovers, Lust for a Vampire, In Search of Dracula, Dracula vs. Frankenstein,  Blackenstein, The Incredible 2-Headed Transplant, Night of the Bloody Apes, a scene from Gorilla Woman, Horror High, Evilspeak, The Island of Dr. Moreau, Uninvited, The Werewolf and the Yeti, Night of the Demon, Entrails of a Beautiful Woman, The Loreley’s Grasp, The Unseen, The Slayer, One Dark Night, Mutant, Zombie 4:  After Death, Don’t Look in the Basement, Don’t Open the Door, Don’t Open the Window, Don’t Go in the House, Don’t Answer the Phone, Don’t Look Now, Burnt Offerings, House by the Cemetery, The House of Missing Girls, The House That Vanished, The Raw Ones, Bloodsucking Freaks, and The Late Great Planet Earth. 

LET’S GET PHYSICAL: DRIVE-IN MADNESS! (1987) ***

FORMAT:  DVD

James Karen hosts this fun and entertaining look at drive-in, horror, and exploitation films.  It plays like a mash-up of a trailer compilation and a documentary/celebration of B-movies.  Along the way such horror titans as George Romero, Tom Savini, and Linnea Quigley show up and give their insights on the pictures as well as a little background information on themselves. 

Russell Streiner and John Russo (who also co-produced) talk about the genesis of Night of the Living Dead and Bobbie Bresee narrates behind the scenes footage of her in the make-up chair for Evil Spawn. Most of the trailers come from Independent-International or Empire Pictures.  Independent-International’s head honcho, Sam Sherman is also on hand to tell us how the company got started and how they distributed and advertised films like Satan’s Sadists (“A rebellion of human garbage!”), Dracula vs. Frankenstein, and The Naughty Stewardesses.  Famous Monsters of Filmland creator Forrest J. Ackerman is also around to introduce his death scene from Dracula vs. Frankenstein and gives a funny tidbit about the shooting of the film.  I wish he was able to give us a tour of his “Ackermansion” while he was at it. 

For the most part, Drive-In Madness! is a bit of a hodgepodge, but a rather entertaining one.  Since the trailers come from only a handful of sources, there isn’t much in the way of variety (if you’re overly familiar with the companies’ output, that is).  They are nevertheless quite enjoyable.  The interview segments are informative too.  In fact, you’ll probably wish they were longer (especially the stuff with Romero and Savini).  I could’ve done without the bits with the couple in a classic car making out at the drive-in while watching clips though.  Other than that, this is a breezy little clip package/trailer comp that should appeal to B-movie fans young and old. 

The complete trailer list is as follows:  Nurse Sherri, Girls for Rent, The Blood-O-Rama Shock Festival (Blood Fiend, Brides of Blood, Blood Creature, and The Blood Drinkers), From Beyond, Horror of the Blood monsters, Night of the Living Dead, a double feature of The Human Duplicators and Mutiny in Outer Space, Troll, Blazing Stewardesses, Dead Time Stories, Ghoulies, Blood of Ghastly Horror, Satan’s Sadists, Dracula vs. Frankenstein, Macabro, Frankenstein’s Bloody Terror, The Twilight People, Don’t Open the Window, The Naughty Stewardesses, Vampyres, Psychos in Love, The Booby Hatch,  Midnight, a double feature of Dracula, Prince of Darkness and The Plague of the Zombies, a double feature of Queen of Blood and Blood Bath, Bloodeaters, The Green Slime, and House of Psychotic Women. 

AKA:  Screen Scaries.