(Streamed via Plex)
A vampire babe named Djuna (Josephine de la Baume) picks up Paolo (Milo Ventimiglia from Rocky Balboa) at a video store. They quickly fall in love, and she decides the only way they can be together is to turn him into a vampire. Their bliss is soon interrupted when her troublemaking sister Mimi (Roxane Mesquida) comes for a visit.
Written and directed by John Cassavetes’ daughter Xan, Kiss of the Damned is simultaneously arty and low rent. Superficially, it looks classy and respectable, but there’s really not much here to differentiate it from countless other bloodsucker dramas that have come before. It works slightly better during the courtship phase of Djuna and Paolo’s relationship than when she is showing him the ropes of being a vampire. The film does get a little lift once Mimi enters the picture, however her constant bickering with Djuna doesn’t have much dramatic oomph to carry the bulk of the picture. It also doesn’t help that vampire sex scenes are uneven at best. While Ventimiglia and Mesquida’s tryst in the shower is appropriately steamy, the rest of the lovemaking/blood drinking sequences offer more tease than please. The only touch I really enjoyed was the fact they drink a synthetic blood substitute called “politically correct plasma”.
Mesquida has a bit of spark about her, but de la Baume is pretty annoying as the lead bloodsucker. She spends just as much time whining as she does drinking blood, which ruins some of the fun. Ventimiglia is fine if a bit bland as the romantic lead. Michael Rapaport is amusing though in an extended cameo as Ventimiglia’s coke-snorting agent. Another bright spot is Riley Keough who appears late in the game as a victim. You’ll wish she had more to do because when she’s on screen, this undead drama fitfully comes to life.
Ultimately, Kiss of the Damned doesn’t explore any new territory. If you like romantically tinged vampire dramas, you might enjoy it. For me, it was fine, but forgettable. I guess it might’ve worked better if the vampires weren’t a bunch of self-absorbed, classist fat cats. If anything, the film just goes to show that vampire hoity-toity cocktail parties are just as boring as human ones.
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