A shipment of “killer” marijuana is delivered to a struggling strip club owner. Little does he know there’s a nest of deadly spiders lurking within the wacky weed. Soon, the place is infested with big ass bugs. Whenever they bite a dancer, their venom acts as sort of an ersatz Spanish Fly, turning them into complete nymphos.
Bite Me! is one of those movies that proves The Video Vacuum Rule that any movie can be made better if you set it in a strip club. I’m sure a flick about giant bugs could’ve worked in a shopping mall, the suburbs, or on a nuclear test site. It just hits different when the ginormous spiders invade a strip club. It also helps that there are some genuine laughs to be had, thanks to the fun special effects and game performances. Sure, there may be a couple of gratuitous characters (like the annoying DEA agent who keeps popping up) and unnecessary subplots, but whenever writer/director Brett (The Screaming Dead) Piper is showcasing the big bugs and bodacious babes, it often works like gangbusters.
Misty Mundae is top-billed and gets a fun Rambo parody scene that allows her to show off her comedic chops. Julian Wells is also a lot of fun as the sexy Mafioso who wants to shut the club down so she can buy it. She has a great scene where she gets bit by a spider and then hops on stage and struts her stuff on the stripper pole.
However, it’s Caitlyn Ross who steals the movie as the lethargic stripper, Amber. She gives what has to be one of the most memorable stripteases in cinema history when she falls asleep on the stripper pole in mid-performance. Too bad she only starred in a handful of films because based on her ability to combine comedy with sultry sex appeal, she could’ve been top notch B-Movie Queen.
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