Owen (Justice Smith) and Maddy (Brigette Lundy-Paine) are two teenage social misfits who bond over their love of a kids show called The Pink Opaque. When Maddy mysteriously disappears, it leaves the painfully awkward Owen to his own devices. Years later, she returns and tells him she was actually in the show. And I don’t mean “on” the show, but IN the show. Now, she’s heading back and wants Owen to join her. But… like… she’s got to be crazy… right?
There’s a good jumping off point somewhere in I Saw the TV Glow, but the filmmakers can never manage to follow through on its admittedly solid hook. Writer/director Jane Schoenbrun gets points for the overall vibe as the nonstop bisexual lighting is cool and some scenes are dripping with atmosphere. However, the film drags its feet so much that once it finally gets to where it’s going, it was pretty much all for naught, which is extremely frustrating to say the least.
The problem with slow burn movies like this one is there’s got to be some sort of payoff to justify the sluggish pace. If there’s going to be some big central mystery, you’ve got to give the audience at least a few breadcrumbs to work with. You can’t get by with ambiguity for ambiguity’s sake for a hundred minutes and expect us to be with you when the ending doesn’t deliver. You can’t hang your hat on a few moments of inexplicable weirdness without at least trying to bring it all together down the homestretch.
The best parts come from the show The Pink Opaque itself. Schoenbrun did a good job at recreating the look and feel of crappy ‘90s Nickelodeon shows, from the bad acting to the shoddy monsters and the cheesy special effects. Sadly, the lore of the show is far more believable than the shit that happens in the movie. Ultimately, I Saw the TV Glow doesn’t burn very bright at all.
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