FORMAT: DVD
I distinctly remember the first time I developed the hots for Milla Jovovich. I was in middle school, and one day, I flipped on HBO, and they had a First Look at the making of Return to the Blue Lagoon. From the first moment I saw Milla, it was love at first sight. Ever since then, I have been Team Milla. Never mind the fact that it took me thirty-three years to finally get around to watching the actual movie.
Directed by William A. Graham, who’s mostly known for TV movies like Guyana Tragedy and Get Christie Love and boasting a screenplay by Leslie Stevens, the creator of The Outer Limits (!), this belated sequel picks up immediately after the events of the first film with Brooke Shields and Christopher Atkins’ boat being found by another ship. Oh, they’re dead. Whoops! Their baby is still alive though, and the widow (Lisa Pelikan) on board quickly adopts it. But wouldn’t you know it? Cholera is spreading through the boat, and the widow, the baby, and her child skedaddle. As fate would have it, they wind up right back where the first movie took place, the two-story bamboo hut rancher still intact.
So, this time, instead of having a crusty sailor to teach the younglings how to survive, it’s a prim and proper schoolteacher who gives them spelling lessons and has awkward conversations about the birds and bees. Naturally, she kicks off, and the two kids grow up to be horny teens, played by Jovovich and Sleepwalkers’ Brian Krause. Before long, Milla gets her first period, he gets his first boner, and they do it.
So far, so good. Brooke Shields’ loincloth casts a long shadow, but Milla fills it admirably. (And has a couple of brief nude scenes.) Krause is pretty good too, all things considered. Unfortunately, the lovey-dovey stuff is rushed through for a gratuitous subplot about a crew coming aboard the island and ruining the couple’s bliss.
The longwinded set-up also means Milla doesn’t show up till about the forty-five minute mark. Because of that, there’s only a small window of time when she’s able to do some blue lagooning (if you know what I mean). Oh well, at least the cinematography is excellent.
No comments:
Post a Comment