Small town girl Toni Shannon leaves her family and heads off to Dallas with dreams of becoming a dancer. (“If I don’t get into show business, I’ll just come back home and pick cotton!”) After spending a lot of time walking around “The Big D”, Toni eventually tries her hand at burlesque.
Writer/director Larry (Mars Needs Women) Buchanan shot Naughty Dallas on location at a real strip club in Dallas. It was shot silently, so the “plot” scenes are filled with long reams of narration from a narrator, Shannon, and other random characters. People only shut their trap once the dancing finally occurs.
Too bad many of the dance numbers are flatly filmed. Peggy Steele is up first. Buchanan basically plants the camera and lets the number play out. It’s not very lively till the very end. Up next is Jada, a vivacious redhead. This number is a lot more energetic and at least features a little camera movement. She’s followed by Susanna Long’s semi-comical routine where she removes about a dozen different skirts. Then it’s the Moran Sisters, who dress like French maids. If you’re into sisters AND French maids, then this routine is for you! Colleen Conover is next, and her blasé attitude coupled with the constant cutaways to the leering patrons undermines the effectiveness of this sequence. Finally, it’s Toni’s turn to shine! Unfortunately, she gets cold feet about halfway through her performance and runs off stage. After a pep talk from the star of the show, Kim Ataz (who does a Turkish themed dance), Toni’s confidence is restored.
Ataz’s number is lively as it’s full of backbends and splits, but Buchanan doesn’t do her any favors by keeping the camera so far away from the stage. Then Jada gives an encore performance, and it’s a fiery high-energy number. If only the rest of the dances were of this caliber, Naughty Dallas could’ve been a real winner.
The only segments with synchronized sound are the ones featuring the emcees and the burlesque comedians. The first is a guy who plays banjo, who isn’t exactly laugh-out-loud funny, but I’ve certainly seen worse in these sorts of things. The next is a comedian who dresses like Mother Goose and does dirty rhymes. I wonder if Andrew “Dice” Clay saw this.
AKA: Mondo Exotica. AKA: Life in the Raw. AKA: Naughty Cuties.
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