HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: THE STRANGE CASE OF DR. JEKYLL AND MISS OSBOURNE (1981) **

The potentially potent pairing of Udo Kier and Walerian (The Beast) Borowczyk is undone by turgid pacing and sloppy screenwriting.  Kier stars as Dr. Jekyll, who is throwing an engagement party in his home.  Naturally, Mr. Hyde crashes the party and starts raping guests (both men and women).   While the police comb the area looking for Hyde, Jekyll’s fiancée (Marina Pierro) catches a glimpse of her hubby to-be changing personalities.  Wanting to be with her man no matter what, she pleads with him to let her use his potion to unleash her hidden freaky persona. 

The gruesome scenes of Hyde raping unfortunate partygoers are guaranteed to shock.  I mean his dick is so big it goes through their ass and out their belly.  In another memorable scene, Hyde ties up Patrick Magee and forces him to watch while he has his way with his daughter (who unlike the other guests is more than eager to participate). 

These scenes certainly grab your attention.  Too bad the first half hour is so boring.  Seriously, nothing happens.  Even when Hyde does show up, it's only in frustrating glimpses.  

Fans of Udo are likely to be disappointed by this one, seeing as he did such a great job as Dracula and Frankenstein in the Andy Warhol movies.  Here, he’s not given a whole lot to do as Dr. Jekyll.  Even worse is the fact that another actor plays Mr. Hyde.  I’m sure he could’ve delivered a great performance as Hyde, but Borowczyk doesn’t even give him an opportunity to strut his stuff!  It's unfortunate too because it would’ve been interesting to see what Udo could’ve done with the character.  The guy they got to play Hyde... well… let's just say he's no Udo Kier and leave it at that.  

AKA:  Bloodlust.  AKA:  The Blood of Dr. Jekyll.  AKA:  Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  AKA:  The Bloodbath of Dr. Jekyll.  AKA:  The Experiment.  AKA:  Dr. Jekyll and His Women.  AKA:  Dr. Jekyll and His Wives.  

HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: HIDE AND GO SHRIEK (1988) ***

Most slasher films feature killers stalking teens in a place they shouldn’t be.  Usually in these movies that means the woods, an abandoned house, or in a cemetery.  In the case of Hide and Go Shriek it's... THE FURNITURE STORE. 

The teens spend the night in a furniture store for a party unaware there’s a scary ex-con who lives inside.  One of them says, “I KNOW! Let's play hide and seek!” and they take off in every which direction to hide and/or make out.  Since they’re all split up, it gives the killer a perfect opportunity to do some hacking and slashing.  

A lot of this is just plain silly.  Like, why is there such an abundance of mannequins in a furniture store?  They try to explain it away with one awkward line of dialogue, but you get the feeling this was originally written to take place in a mall, but a crummy furniture shop was all the location manager could afford to rent.  Then again, if there wasn’t a mess of mannequins laying around we wouldn’t have the sweet scene where Sean (“Karate’s Bad Boy” Mike Barnes from Karate Kid 3) Kanan gets impaled with a mannequin arm. 

Director Skip Schoolnik (the guy who edited Halloween 2) delivers the goods in a competent manner.  He handles the stalking scenes efficiently enough and I liked the gimmick of the killer dressing up like his victims to lure in another potential teen.  The T & A quotient is also above average for the genre’s standards.   

It’s in the third act that the film reveals itself to be something truly special.  The unmasking of the killer is positively jaw-dropping.  More surprising is the way the sensitive subject is handled.  It’s a lot more progressive than what you’d normally see in this sort of thing.  The killer is also given one heck of a demise.  Naturally, he comes back for the gratuitous set-up for a sequel.  I for one am a bit sad it never happened.  

AKA:  Close Your Eyes and Pray.

THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS (1976) **

Catharine Burgess stars as a bored, frigid housewife who becomes obsessed with an old mirror in her attic.  One night, she masturbates in front of the mirror and a man comes out of it and fingers her.  Jamie Gillis is the “demon” in the mirror that takes the form of her late father and beckons her to join him on the other side of the mirror. 

Through the Looking Glass is a XXX movie that tries to serve a dual purpose.  It wants to be a psychological drama and a porno flick all rolled in one.  None of the elements really click.  There’s some Alice in Wonderland imagery here, although probably not as much as the title would lead you to think.  Burgess has a lesbian scene with a woman who runs off and says, “I’m late” and there’s a Mad Hatter tea party when the guests fuck a woman with a carrot.  That’s about it though. 

The non-porno scenes are kind of dull and it takes a good twenty minutes to get to the first explicit sex scene.  Even though the scenes revolve around kinky fetishes such as incest and pissing, none of them are particularly hot.  There is also an enema scene, but it’s nowhere near as graphic as the ones found in Water Power, which also featured Gillis.   

Much of the problem lies with Burgess.  She just never really engages the audience.  I did like the scene where the camera actually goes inside of Burgess’ pussy though.  The movie fitfully comes alive when Gillis is on screen.  He has a demented charisma that everyone in the cast lacks.   

Through the Looking Glass’ artistic aspirations are muddled at best, and its turn into horror territory in the third act is even less successful.  If you can get past the sluggish pacing, you’ll be rewarded with a handful of memorable moments.  Overall, it’s just too uneven to be completely successful as either art or porn. 

The effective score was by none other than Harry Manfredini of Friday the 13^th fame.

HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: BLACK DEVIL DOLL FROM HELL (1984) **

This is one of the most infamous no-budget shot-on-video horror movies of the ‘80s.  Like many videotaped wonders, it contains slipshod editing, amateurish performances, and poor audio and picture quality (the latter adds to the overall feel of the film).  The music is pretty good though. 

A lonely God-fearing woman goes into an antique store and buys a ventriloquist dummy.  The puppet (who looks like Lester from Willie Tyler and Lester with dreadlocks) watches her shower and rapes her.  She starts to like it though (she even calls him “Mr. Wonderful”) and soon she becomes a sex-starved trollop.   

Much of Black Devil Doll from Hell is slow and excruciating.  The dialogue scenes are so long and boring that the camera starts wandering around the room filming walls and knickknacks instead of the performers.  If you can get past these long scenes (which take up the bulk of the movie), you’ll be treated to some jaw-dropping antics.   

The money shots of the puppet humping are hilarious.  (“How do you like that bitch?”)  They do tend to go on too long.  You have to wonder if the director had some kind of puppet sex fetish.  These scenes, long as they are, are worth the price of admission.   

It’s those non-puppet scenes that are a problem.  The running time is 90 minutes, but it could’ve easily been cut down to 75.  Okay, 45.  I mean the long disco dancing scene could’ve been excised completely and no one would’ve known the difference.  I would recommend it, but you’re probably better off just watching the puppet fucking highlights and forgetting the rest of it.  If you do decide to watch it in its entirety… well… you were warned.

HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: DEATH WALKS AT MIDNIGHT (1972) **

Director Luciano Ercoli re-teamed with most of the same cast for this spiritual sequel to Death Walks on High Heels.  Everyone is playing different characters than last time, but the plot is thematically similar.  Like Death Walks on High Heels, it’s way too long and things get needlessly convoluted by the end.  I will say this for Death Walks at Midnight:  It has a much better hook and gives a lot more screen time to its leading lady, Susan Scott.  

Scott stars as a model who agrees to take a new experimental psychedelic drug so her boyfriend (Simon Andreau) can write about the effects for a tabloid.  During her drug trip, she sees a woman being brutally killed by a man with a spiked iron glove.  Naturally, no one believes her until the killer comes after her. 

The opening scene packs a wallop.  It’s almost like something out of a Dario Argento movie.  Things quickly bog down from there though.  The scenes of Scott playing Nancy Drew aren't very involving either.  As with Death Walks on High Heels, there are so many red herrings and plot twists in the final act that it gets to be a bit much.  However, I’ll give this one the slight edge, just for the harsh iron glove slayings. 

AKA:  Cry Out in Terror.  AKA:  Death Caresses at Midnight.

HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: DEATH WALKS ON HIGH HEELS (1971) **

A stripper (Susan Scott) receives threatening phone calls from a killer with a robot voice.  He thinks she has some diamonds her late jewel thief father stole, and he claims he’ll kill her if she doesn’t fork them over.  She doesn’t take him seriously until he breaks into her room and accosts her with a straight razor.  Thinking her drunkard boyfriend (Simon Andreau) is the killer, she pops off to London with an adoring fan, a rich married doctor (Frank Wolff), to escape his clutches. 

There’s a plot twist halfway through that's worthy of a Hitchcock movie.  I wouldn’t dream of spoiling it for you.  I will say that as a consequence, the alluring Susan Scott gets less and less screen time.  Without her slinky presence, Death Walks on High Heels loses a lot of its drive.  

Taken on its own merits, the first act is a solid little piece of exploitation filmmaking.  It’s in the second act that the film loses its way, big time.  It’s here where it stops being a slightly trashy thriller and becomes a dull police procedural.  During the finale, director Luciano Ercoli piles on twist after twist, almost to the point where you’ll gladly take any conclusion as long as it makes the movie end.   All the endless twists wind up doing is jerking the audience around, which is a shame considering how well-executed the first half-hour was. 

AKA:  Death Stalks on High Heels.

HALLOWEEN HANGOVER: ANTIBIRTH (2016) * ½

Natasha Lyonne gets wasted at a party and winds up pregnant.  She isn’t fazed by it though and continues boozing and drugging it up.  Eventually, she realizes this is no ordinary pregnancy as the new life inside her slowly starts to take over her body. 

I wanted to see this mainly for the cast alone.  It’s been a while since Lyonne has had a role she could really sink her teeth into.  I mean who wouldn’t want to see her and Chloe Sevigny teamed together for a monster baby movie?  As a bonus, we have the one and only Meg Tilly on hand playing a mystery lady who shadows Lyonne.  I can’t remember the last time I saw her in a film and it’s good to have her back on the screen where she belongs.   

Unfortunately, the movie is borderline unwatchable.  How can you take such likeable performers and then give them unlikeable, loathsome characters to portray?  It quickly becomes tiresome watching them sitting around, getting high, and watching TV.  Sad thing is, most of the running time is devoted to this. 

Once we finally get to the horrific scenes, things improve slightly.  The gore effects are well done, and the blister-popping scene alone is enough to ensure it won’t get a One Star rating.  The birthing sequence, when it finally rears its ugly head (and I mean that quite literally), is appropriately icky.  However, the final moments of the film plunge deeper and deeper into excess, culminating in WTF note that will leave your alternately shaking and scratching your head.