Wednesday, January 13, 2021

HINDSIGHT IS 2020: AMITYVILLE WITCHES (2020) ***

If you’ve ever wondered what ‘90s Skinamax siren Kira Reed (now Lorsch) is up to nowadays, she’s apparently starring in this Amityville cash-in that I’m guessing is also trying to rip-off Robert Zemeckis’ remake of The Witches.  Or maybe that new reboot of The Craft.  Or possibly even try to ride the coattails of the inexplicable resurgence of Hocus Pocus.  There are also moments that gleefully crib from Suspiria (both versions). 

Reed was always one of my favorite goddesses of late-night cable, so checking out Amityville Witches was going to be a forgone conclusion for me.  Much to my surprise, her performance, along with the capable direction by Rebecca (Pet Graveyard) Matthews kept me engaged.  I’m just as shocked as anyone that I enjoyed an unrelated Amityville movie this much.  Maybe those witches cast a spell on me or something. 

A student named Jessica (Sarah T. Cohen) goes to an all-girls school which she quickly learns is owned by an evil witch named Dominique (Amanda-Jade Tyler).  She plans to sacrifice Jessica to a demon in exchange for untold power.  Luckily for Jessica, a trio of sexy witches (Reed, Donna Spangler, and Brittan Taylor) arrive on the scene and rescue her.  It’s then up to our three witches to not only protect Jessica, but to train her to unlock her hidden witchy powers in order to fight Dominque and slay the demon. 

Amityville Witches is as good of a movie as you could possibly make that has the word “Amityville” in the title but has nothing to do with The Amityville Horror.  The opening sequence, set in Amityville in 1602, isn’t bad, and I kind of got a chuckle from the early scene where the three witches use their powers to stop a duo of home invaders.  I also enjoyed the fight scenes where they perform Jedi power battles by holding their hands in the air while colored lights and chintzy special effects fill the screen. 

Cheesy visual effects aside, the chemistry between Reed, Spangler, and Taylor is genuine.  Even more surprising is the fact that the villainess shows tinges of humanity which makes for a strong three-dimensional character.  In a year full of weak villains, Tyler is one of the best.

The finale even flirts with a bit of the old Val Lewton school of filmmaking as it effectively suggests more than it actually shows.  When most modern-day horror movies do this, it usually falls flat, but this is one of the rare cases when it works.  The eventual appearance of the demon is very well done too.  The makeup is excellent, as the special effects team have taken an unexpected approach to creating something unique and interesting rather than your typical cinematic demon.  

Sure, the third act is a tad rushed.  Yes, the budget constraints often show.  However, this is way better than it had any right being.  There’s even a Marvel-style set-up for a sequel in the end, which (witch?) I would be totally down for provided the main stars all return. 

AKA:  Witches of Amityville.  AKA:  Witches of Amityville Academy. 

2 comments:

  1. I enjoyed and appreciated this (fair) review, for taking the film in the right spirit which isn't always the case for micro budget horror. Many thanks, Tom Jolliffe (aka, the writer). Never say never for the sequel too. ;)

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  2. Many thanks for stopping by, Tom. I anxiously await the sequel. Feel free to drop me a line now and then on when to expect not only Amityville Witches 2, but any future projects you want to promote.

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