Haven tries for the whole Pulp Fiction-style gimmick of having three interconnected stories of various lowlifes and criminals. It even has a pretty stacked cast of hungry up-and-comers, veteran character actors, and pretty boys trying to flex their acting muscles. While the cast is strong, the writing is weak. You know your characters are paper-thin when a cast this talented is unable to breathe any life into them.
All three stories revolve around various criminals in the Cayman Islands. The first centers on Bill Paxton, who plays a white-collar thief who escapes to the Islands with his troublesome daughter (Agnes Bruckner) in tow. The second tale involves a beach bum (Orlando Bloom) who deflowers Zoe Saldana and must face the wrath of her angry brother (Anthony Mackie). The final story is about Paxton’s banker (Stephen Dillane) who tries to cut a deal with the cops and escape the island with a cool million.
The stories amble on without much urgency or drive. The first story in particular is a total waste of Bill Paxton as he is given virtually nothing to do. The scenes of Bruckner getting involved with some hoodlums at a drug-fueled party are pretty unpleasant too.
The part where Mackie throws acid in Bloom’s face is shocking though. Not because seeing the usually handsome Bloom being disfigured is shocking. It’s more because we’re shocked that something actually happened in the movie.
It’s all pretty laughable though because after Orlando Bloom has acid thrown in his face, he looks… well… just like Orlando Bloom.
The stories eventually intersect and overlap, but it seems more like an excuse to reuse footage to pad the running time. I get what writer/director Frank E. Flowers (who hasn’t made a movie before or since) is trying to do. He wants to contrast the white-collar criminals who come to the island to the street-level ones who inhabit it year-round. It’s just that it’s clunky and not thought out very well.
I did think it was funny that so many characters called each other “pussyhole” though.
This one was OK but didn't live up to its potential.
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