ONE MISSED CALL (2005) **

I usually regard watching J-Horror as the cinematic equivalent of eating my vegetables.  It isn’t my favorite horror subgenre, but I think with more exposure, I gain a better appreciation for it, even though most of the modern movies are pretty crappy.  I sort of enjoyed the American remake of One Missed Call, so I figured I would give the original a whirl.  The fact that it was directed by Takashi Miike didn’t hurt.

One Missed Call is an obvious variation on The Ring.  Instead of people dying after watching a cursed videotape, they die after not answering their cellphone.  The mysterious caller leaves a message with an audio recording of how they will die in the next few days.  After Yumi’s (Ko Shibasaki) friends are killed by the curse, she too receives the ominous phone message.  With her days numbered, she turns to Hiroshi (Shinichi Tsutsumi) for help.  His sister also died from the killer call, and together, they race against the clock to save Yumi’s life. 

While it’s interesting to see such an out-there auteur like Miike tackling a mainstream idea, the results are decidedly mixed.  There are a couple of stretches where the premise really works.  Miike delivers a solid set-up and manages to attain a modicum of atmosphere.  He even pulls off a handful of effective moments.  (The appearances of the ghost’s hands are especially memorable.)

The real issue is the overlength.  While this might’ve made for a crackerjack eighty-eight-minute movie, the premise really buckles thanks to a running time that borders on two hours.  Not to mention the fact that for every sort of cool moment Miike gives us, there is another that tries our patience or just plain doesn’t work.  The plot also makes a few odd detours that could’ve easily been excised in the cutting room and no one would’ve missed them.  There are also about two too many fake-out endings in the third act that also add unnecessarily to the running time.

I have to say that while there are a few choice moments here, for the most part, the movie is a frustrating experience overall.  I enjoyed the remake more because of its sharper focus.  (Even then, it really wasn’t all that great).  If this One Missed Calls calls you, hang up.

AKA:  You’ve Got a Call.  AKA:  The Call.