(Streamed via Netflix)
When I heard Rob Zombie was directing a reboot of The Munsters, I was optimistic. I mean his best song, “Dragula” was inspired by The Munsters’ race car, so who would be more qualified to bring the beloved monster family into the 21st century? Sadly, it’s just a fucking mess.
It's an origin story, which I guess wasn’t the worst way to go, but it takes an inordinate amount of time to get going. In fact, Herman (Jeff Daniel Phillips) doesn’t even show up until about a half-hour into the flick as all that running time is devoted to a mad scientist (Richard Brake) putting together parts of dead bodies to bring him to life.
Sadly, once Herman finally shows up, he’s freaking annoying. Gone is the Fred Gwynne iteration of the character. Phillips’ take on the character is a guy who’s basically an unfunny stand-up comedian. I know it’s mostly a kids movie and all, but Herman’s constant one-liners wouldn’t have cut it on the back of a box of Franken Berry.
At least Sheri Moon Zombie is able to channel Yvonne DeCarlo’s old persona while infusing it with her own sensibilities, making Lily a joy to watch. Daniel Roebuck isn’t bad as “The Count”. I appreciate they didn’t even try to make him like “Grandpa” as there’s only one Al Lewis, but his material is as equally creaky as Herman’s and his jokes are mostly groaners.
Swindled out of their ancestral castle in Transylvania, The Munsters are forced to relocate to their more familiar residence at 1313 Mockingbird Lane. And, uh, well… that’s about it as far as the plot goes. Not that a Munsters movie necessarily needs a strong plot, but it needs… SOMETHING to string together all the bad jokes and awful puns. What’s more, the villainess (Catherine Schell) never has any real interaction with the family. Since there’s no confrontation or tension between them, there’s nothing to really advance the plot.
That is, besides Lily and Herman’s courtship scenes. Too bad they are almost unbearable. Once the Lily and Herman music video for “I Got You Babe” was in full swing, I kind of mentally checked out from the entire movie.
Another thing: It’s kind of hard to get past the film’s garish, ugly, and oversaturated look. The whole thing looks like a puke-stained Day-Glo Basil Gogos painting. Some of the visual quirks work (like the Creepshow-inspired backgrounds for some of the close-ups) are neat, but the majority of it just feels like an assault on the eyeballs.
Also, there’s no Eddie! How can you make The Munsters without Eddie Munster? ARGH.
strongly disagree, I thought the film looked damn good and I thought it was pretty funny, course I never thought much of the original series so that might have something to do with it.
ReplyDelete