A loser named Luther (Mike Hartsfield) buys a backpack at a garage sale in Amityville. The first day, it kills his cat. Then a janitor. Then the girl he has a crush on who won’t give him the time of day. Then his boss. Finally, the demented backpack comes for Luther.
The backpack itself is kind of cool. It looks like a homemade version of a Loungefly bag. It’s shaped like the famous house and is adorned with little plastic sleeves that are shaped like the iconic windows. (Flames are seen inside of it when it gets angry.) When it transforms, it even grows the house’s chimney too.
As Luther the loser, Hartsfield looks like an amalgam of Fred Armisen and David Cross. He delivers a tour de force performance. Many scenes hinge on his ability to rant and rave to no one in particular (or at least to a backpack). The surprising thing is, these moments (while they aren’t exactly laugh out loud funny) are amusing more often than not.
Amityville Backpack proves that sometimes the dumbest ideas can be the most entertaining. I mean I can’t quite in good conscience call this a “good” movie, but when you’re dabbling in the world of fake Amityville flicks, you take what you can get. For example, I found myself genuinely amused when the backpack took a break from its rampage to lounge by the pool and drink a beer. Or the part where it rides around the city on its skateboard. Touches like this is what separates it from something like Amityville Scarecrow.
Yes, as with the recent rash of Amityville movies, there are still too many cheap looking scenes of news anchors delivering updates on the crime spree that act as padding. These little deterrents are to be expected as they come with the territory. As a viewer, you have to ask yourself, “Am I the kind of person who wants to see a backpack shoot a guy point blank in the face?”
Since I gave this ** ½, you can probably guess what kind of person I am.
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