DUMBO (2019) *** ½

Ever since I was a kid, Dumbo has been my favorite Disney movie.  As a teenager, it resonated even more.  Dumbo was relentlessly teased and bullied by his peers and the only way he dealt with it was to get drunk and wake up the next morning in a tree.  I can relate.  (I never quite got to the point where I was able to rise above the bullies and reign down a hail of fire-roasted peanuts on my tormentors though.)

The good news is, I can relate to this new Dumbo just as much.  It’s quite an inspirational tale.  It’s the film that shows us that if you try your best to overcome the obstacles life throws at you, one day Eva Green will climb on top of you and ride you like there’s no tomorrow.  I think there’s a message there for all of us.  

Tim Burton’s take on the Disney classic hits the familiar beats from the original.  The big difference is that the human characters are split 50-50 in the good and evil department.  In the original, they were pretty much bastards all around.  

Instead of Timothy (who at least has a cameo) as Dumbo’s best pal and champion, we have Colin Farrell and his kids.  Farrell comes home from the war missing an arm, with his career in the circus uncertain.  He gets put in charge of the elephants, and it’s up to him and his kids to make sure the big-eared elephant Dumbo is their next star attraction.  

The first half sticks fairly close to the original.  (There were no singing crows, though.)  I especially loved the way the old songs creeped into Danny Elfman’s score (especially “Casey Jr.”).  The second half, in which the circus gets bought out by a big corporation who wants to exploit Dumbo isn’t nearly as good, but it’s not without its charms.  I guess Burton’s message is that even if a major conglomerate owns your ass, you can still be an edgy outcast who is able to flourish and (literally) rise above your confines.    

As much as I love the original, I was glad this wasn’t a shot-for-shot remake, like what that newfangled Aladdin looks to be.  This is Tim Burton’s take on the classic tale.  There is one sequence in particular (the escape from “Devil’s Island”) that is one of the most Tim Burton-y things Tim Burton has ever done.  

The big emotional beats are taken from the original.  The new stuff is sweet and all, but not a patch on the original.  That said, those heart-tugging moments still work (mostly because the CGI Dumbo is freaking adorable), and the “Baby Mine” sequence has the power to get the waterworks going with minimum effort.  

The human cast, superfluous as they are, are still quite good.  Green is great as the trapeze artist who goes from corporate arm candy to carny mother hen.  Farrell is strong as the family man hesitant to step up and become a leader.  Danny DeVito is fun as the crotchety ringleader who’s tempted by the almighty dollar.  

Michael Keaton is probably the most interesting as the evil sleazebag.  If you notice, his accent slightly changes from scene to scene.  Sometimes he sounds French, other times, English.  Heck, there are times when you don’t know where his accent is from.  It sort of clues you in that this guy is a phony from the get-go.  

The best scene though is a cameo (which I will not spoil) that is so gratuitous, outlandish, and out of place that it almost feels like it came out of an episode of The Simpsons.  It’s so crazy that it almost takes you out of the movie.  However, it is quite hilarious (one of the biggest I’ve had at the movies in some time), so I’ll allow it.