SCREAM AND STREAM AGAIN: ANNABELLE COMES HOME (2019) ***

(Streamed via HBO Max)

I run hot-to-cold on these Conjure-Verse movies.  The first Conjuring was pretty good, but the sequel was merely so-so.  The spin-offs are increasingly hit-and-miss, with Annabelle being one of the worst major studio releases of the 21^st century.  The sequel, Annabelle:  Creation was a step in the right direction, although it was no great shakes either.  Well, I’m happy to report that the Annabelle spin-off series has finally found its stride with the fun, entertaining, and surprisingly heartfelt Annabelle Comes Home. 

As you probably remember, paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren (Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga) acquired the haunted Annabelle doll and locked it away in their occult basement so it wouldn’t harm anyone.  When they go out of town, they hire a smoking hot babysitter named Mary Ellen (Madison Iseman) to watch their kid (Mckenna Grace).  Naturally, Mary Ellen brings her friend Daniela (Katie Sarife) along, and when no one is looking, she goes down in the basement and accidentally wakes up, not only Annabelle, but all the cursed knickknacks the Warrens have locked up (and for good reason).

I thought it was a nice touch to bring The Conjuring stars Wilson and Farmiga into the spin-off series, but as it turns out, their scenes are actually the weakest element.  Since the movie runs a whopping 106 minutes, their stuff could’ve easily been whittled down.  (They really should’ve had extended cameos.)  Instead, they clog up the first act with a lot of unnecessary rigmarole that prevents the show from getting immediately on the road. 

Once the sexy babysitters unleash the deranged doll from her case, the supernatural shit hits the fan, and the movie goes into overdrive.  This is the kind of film Sam Raimi would call a “Spook-a-Blast”.  Some monster or ghoul is constantly popping out at the audience every five minutes while the soundtrack blares.  No one ever seems to be hurt or in any serious danger, but it’s a helluva fun ride. 

The most surprising part of the movie is that you actually care about these characters.  In most horror flicks, the character of Daniela would’ve been an annoying third wheel who lets the monsters loose because she’s a klutz or something.  Although she starts out with that kind of vibe, we soon learn she is dealing with some major issues and we can sort of sympathize why she does what she does. 

Likewise, Mary Ellen isn’t your average Babysitter Final Girl.  She feels like a real flesh and blood character, and her friendship with Daniela is natural and genuine.  Heck, even the creepy Warren kid is likeable.  In most of these things, whenever a creepy kid sees dead people, they come off as either precocious brats or annoying thumbsuckers.  Here, she is grappling with her “gift”, but still trying to eke out an existence as a regular kid.  It helps that Iseman, Sarife, and Grace have a lot of chemistry together, and when they team up to fight the evil in the basement, you can’t help but root for them.

The basement, it should be said, is a little overcrowded.  I don’t know if the filmmakers were too busy trying to spin-off more spin-offs from this spin-off, but this movie is loaded with (probably too many) monsters, ghosts, and demons.  There are Ferrymen, Killer Brides, Ghost Samurai, and even a goddamn werewolf on the hunt for the kids.  In fact, you have to wonder where the heck Annabelle is some of the time.  Maybe they were trying to do an Avengers team-up deal with all the monsters in the basement rallying together in the name of evil.  It’s all just silly enough to work, although there are times when the wheels threaten to come flying off.

It ultimately comes down to one word:  Fun.  If you’re looking for subtle, intellectual horror, this ain’t it.  If, however, you enjoy horror movies that feel more like a ride, Annabelle Comes Home will be a more than welcome homecoming. 

AKA:  Annabelle 3.