Sunday, October 11, 2020

SHAOLIN VS. EVIL DEAD: ULTIMATE POWER (2006) **

I reviewed Shaolin vs. Evil Dead as part of last year’s Halloween Hangover.  That film wasn’t great, but at least it had a bunch of zombies, a kid shitting out a baby, and a decent set-up for a sequel.  You would think the filmmakers would’ve been wise enough to follow-up on that cliffhanger ending and pick up right where the last one started.  Instead, they gave us a prequel to act as an origin story to show us how the bad guy in the first movie became so evil. 

It all starts with a longwinded sequence about a scar-faced female warlord poisoning a husband/wife team of Kung Fu fighters.  Phoenix (Marsha Yuen) dies in childbirth and her husband Dragon (Fan Siu-Wong) survives thanks to an antidote delivered by a young Shaolin monk named Roam Chow.  The boy then stays with Dragon and helps raise his son, Ingenious.  Unfortunately, Ingenious grows to be a cruel man and his father appoints Roam Chow to be the new leader of the clan.  Ingenious is outraged for being passed over, kills his father, and sets out to unite two mystical swords that will give him the ultimate power. 

Shaolin vs. Evil Dead:  Ultimate Power has its moments, but you have to sit through an awful lot of exposition to get to them.  I know this is supposed to be an origin story, but it just feels like a series of unending prologues than a real narrative.  (There’s even an animated fable for Christ’s sakes.)  Ultimately, there’s just way too much plot and not enough action. 

It also takes an exorbitant amount of time for the horror elements to fall into place.  You have to wait until the last twenty minutes before the army of hopping vampires show up.  At least there’s a lot of them, which leads to an OK finale.

It’s in the final act where Gordon Liu shows up to connect the two movies as the full-grown Roam Chow.  The battle between him and his twisted brother isn’t bad.  Using some Shaolin magic, they are transported into a forcefield where they do battle using all the elements, which leads to scenes of them fighting rock monsters, fire dragons, and a giant wooden stake.  I just wish the ending didn’t rely so heavily on lame deus ex machina.

Really, it’s a not-terrible Kung Fu flick.  The swordplay shenanigans and the wirework wizardry aren’t half-bad.  It’s just that if I had known the horror stuff was so lightweight, I wouldn’t bothered to watch it this month.  I mean, how can you even call this a Shaolin vs. Evil Dead movie if it doesn’t feature a kid shitting out a baby?  (In all fairness, we do get a childbirth scene, albeit an all-too traditional one.)

AKA:  Shaolin vs. Evil Dead 2.  AKA:  Shaolin vs. Evil Dead 2:  Ultimate Power.

No comments:

Post a Comment