THE 2018 VIDEO VACUUM AWARDS

Here it is, folks!  The moment you’ve all been waiting for.  Here are the winners of The 2018 Video Vacuum Awards!

Best Dialogue

And the nominees are…

Creed 2 for “He broke things in me that ain’t never been fixed!”
The Equalizer 2 for “I expect a 5 Star rating!”
Mandy for “You ripped my shirt!”
Mute for “I’m AWOL!  You’re an A-Hole!”
Ready Player One for “It’s fucking Chucky!”
Red Sparrow for “You sent me to whore school!”
Solo:  A Star Wars Story for “I know.”
Spider-Man:  Into the Spider-Verse for “I frolic.  I dance.  I do this in my pants!”
Superfly for “I’m not going nowhere where the j’s are silent!”
Teen Titans Go! To the Movies for “Save me from Gene Hackman’s real estate scam!”

And the winner is… The Equalizer 2 for “I expect a 5 Star rating!”

Best Scene I Could Not Make Up

And the nominees are…

An Alien chestburster erupting out of Goro in Ready Player One
Iron Giant vs. Mechagodzilla in Ready Player One
The Trip to the Overlook Hotel in Ready Player One
The weaponization of Chucky in Ready Player One
Eric Roberts’ La La Land-inspired song and dance in Stalked by My Doctor:  Patient’s Revenge

And the winner is… Eric Roberts’ La La Land-inspired song and dance in Stalked by My Doctor:  Patient’s Revenge

Best Kids Movie

And the nominees are…

Goosebumps 2:  Haunted Halloween
Hotel Transylvania 3:  Summer Vacation
The House with a Clock in its Walls
Paddington 2
Teen Titans Go! To the Movies

And the winner is… Teen Titans Go!  To the Movies

Best DTV/Streaming Movie

And the nominees are…

Before I Wake
A Futile and Stupid Gesture
Kickboxer:  Retaliation
The Night Comes for Us
Puppet Master:  The Littlest Reich

And the winner is… The Night Comes for Us!

Worst DTV/Streaming Movie

And the nominees are…

Black Water
China Salesman
Deep Blue Sea 2
Godzilla:  City on the Edge of Battle
Hellraiser:  Judgment

And the LOSER is… China Salesman!

Worst DTV/Streaming Sequel

And the nominees are…

The Cloverfield Paradox
Deep Blue Sea 2
Escape Plan 2:  Hades
Godzilla:  City on the Edge of Battle
Hellraiser:  Judgment

And the LOSER is… Hellraiser:  Judgment!

Best Action Movie

And the nominees are…

Bumblebee
Death Wish
Solo:  A Star Wars Story
Superfly
Venom

And the winner is… Venom! 

Worst Action Movie

And the nominees are…

China Salesman
Black Water
The Debt Collector
Escape Plan 2:  Hades
Peppermint

And the LOSER is… China Salesman!

Best Comic Book Movie

And the nominees are…

Ant-Man and the Wasp
Aquaman
Avengers:  Infinity War
Teen Titans Go! To the Movies
Venom

And the winner is… Venom!

 Best Sequel 

And the nominees are…

Ant-Man and the Wasp
Creed 2
Pacific Rim:  Uprising
Bumblebee
Solo:  A Star Wars Story

And the winner is… Creed 2!

Worst Sequel

And the nominees are…

Deep Blue Sea 2
Escape Plan 2:  Hades
Godzilla:  City on the Edge of Battle
Hellraiser:  Judgment
The Nun

And the LOSER is… Hellraiser:  Judgment!

Best Horror Movie

And the nominees are…

Before I Wake
The House with a Clock in its Walls
Mandy
The Meg
Mom and Dad

And the winner is… Mom and Dad!

Worst Horror Movie

And the nominees are…

Day of the Dead:  Bloodline
Deep Blue Sea 2
Hellraiser:  Judgment
Hereditary
The Nun

And the LOSER is… Hellraiser:  Judgment!

Best Sci-Fi Movie

And the nominees are…

Ant-Man and the Wasp
Bumblebee
Pacific Rim:  Uprising
Ready Player One
Solo:  A Star Wars Story

And the winner is… Ant-Man and the Wasp!

Worst Sci-Fi Movie

And the nominees are…

Annihilation
The Cloverfield Paradox
Godzilla:  City on the Edge of Battle
Godzilla:  Planet of the Monsters
Mute

And the LOSER is… Godzilla:  City on the Edge of Battle!

Best Movie Based on a TV Show

And the nominees are…

Bumblebee
The Equalizer 2
Goosebumps 2:  Haunted Halloween
Mission:  Impossible:  Fallout
Teen Titans Go! To the Movies

And the winner is… Teen Titans Go!  To the Movies

Best Drama

And the nominees are…

Bohemian Rhapsody
Creed 2
The Last Movie Star
The Mule
The Other Side of the Wind

And the winner is… Creed 2!

Best Actor

And the nominees are…

Trevor Jackson (Superfly)
Michael B. Jordan (Black Panther)
Joaquin Phoenix (You Were Never Really Here)
Burt Reynolds (The Last Movie Star)
Bruce Willis (Death Wish)

And the winner is… Joaquin Phoenix!

Best Actress

And the nominees are…

Cate Blanchett (The House with a Clock in its Walls)
Hailee Steinfeld (Bumblebee)
Marci Miller (Children of the Corn:  Runaway)
Tessa Thompson (Creed 2)
Ariel Winter (The Last Movie Star)

And the winner is… Tessa Thompson!

Best Director

And the nominees are…

Steven Caple, Jr. (Creed 2)
Ruben Fleischer (Venom)
Ron Howard (Solo:  A Star Wars Story)
Peyton Reed (Ant-Man and the Wasp)
Director X (Superfly)

And the winner is… Steven Caple, Jr.! 

Worst Picture 
And the nominees are… 
China Salesman
Hellraiser:  Judgment
Hereditary
Peppermint
211 

And the LOSER is… China Salesman!

Best Picture 

And the nominees are…

Ant-Man and the Wasp
Creed 2
Solo:  A Star Wars Story
Superfly
Venom

And the winner is… Creed 2!

That wraps up The Video Vacuum Awards for this year.  Thank you all for visiting, commenting, and participating in the discussion.  I look forward to exploring another wild year of cinema with you all.  See you at the movies!