I must not have gotten enough of people saying, “Crash and burn!” while watching Robot Jox, so I decided to check out this sort of sequel/sort of spin-off. Thankfully, that phrase isn’t repeated nearly as often this time around as it refers to a computer virus.
Tyson (Paul Ganus) is a motorcycle-riding rebel who drives through the wasteland and hunkers down at an old TV station to wait out a “thermal storm”. The other inhabitants are an old newscaster (Ralph Waite), his camerawoman granddaughter (Megan Ward), a teacher (Eva LaRue), a Rush Limbaugh dude (Jack McGee), two hookers (Elizabeth Maclellan and Katharine Armstrong), and Bill Moseley. During the night, the old dude is murdered, and the group eventually figure out one of them is a “synthoid” robot killer. (“One of us ain’t one of us!”)
Crash and Burn is a bait-and-switch bore. It was sold as a giant robot movie, but it’s more of a post-nuke murder mystery. Or more accurately, a people walking around dark hallways, boiler rooms, and basements movie. And a dull one at that. There are also scenes that rip-off The Thing (there’s a blood test to see who’s human) and the Terminator (unstoppable robot killer).
Once Moseley goes crazy (I would put a spoiler warning here, but c’mon, you knew the robot was going to be Bill Moseley) and starts killing everybody, the movie comes to life. Too bad you have to wait until the last half-hour for the big reveal. Even if Bill is only doing a thin imitation of his beloved Chop Top character (he even has an exposed metal plate in his head at one point), he’s still kind of fun to watch. (“That’s all folks!”) Till then, it’s a tough slog.
Oh, and if you came to the party expecting some giant robot action, you’re in the wrong place. It takes about seventy-five minutes for Ward to get it online. Once it finally wakes up, it doesn’t do a whole lot before it crashes and burns.
AKA: Synthoid 2030. AKA: Robot Jox 2: Crash and Burn.
this one was alright.
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