I
don’t like the term “guilty pleasure”. I
feel like if something gives you pleasure, you shouldn’t feel guilty. Even though I love a good blood n’ guts movie
as much as the next guy, I do find myself occasionally getting sucked into one
of those cheesy thrillers on Lifetime.
Stalked by My Doctor was one of the best of its kind, mostly because of
the gonzo performance by Eric Roberts. This
third entry is easily the best in the series and offers some of the most
jaw-dropping WTF moments I’ve seen all year.
The
sleazy Dr. Beck (Eric Roberts) was found not guilty of kidnapping a former
patient, Sophie (Brianna Chomer) and is now living in Phoenix working as a
professor at a medical school. Sophie is
still having nightmares about being attacked by Beck and she decides the only
recourse is to follow him to the university and make his life a living
hell. Eventually, she gets him fired,
but he doesn’t seem to mind too much because he’s busy spending time getting
close to one of his students, Melissa (Anna Marie Dobbins), who also has some obvious
daddy issues. Just when he’s seemingly ready
for a new happy life, Sophie turns the tables on Beck and attacks him. The cops don’t want to help him since they
think Beck should already be in jail for his crimes, so it’s up to Melissa to
help him stop Sophie’s reign of terror.
The
second Stalked by My Doctor movie was pretty good, but it suffered from an
uneven tone. This one just goes for
broke, embracing the typical Lifetime Movie clichés while simultaneously forging
its own weird path. It also firmly
embraces the weirdness of the Roberts mystique, allowing him to go gleefully
over the top, playing not one, but two suitably out-there roles. Some of the best moments in the movie come
when the out-of-control Roberts argues with his other “sane” self, who sits in
the corner wearing a Hawaiian shirt while drinking a Pina Colada.
If
you told me that Stalked by My Doctor:
Patient’s Revenge was going to be the best movie I’ve seen so far for
The 31 Movies of Horror-Ween, I probably would’ve believed you given my love
for all things Eric Roberts. If you told
me it was going to be the best movie in the Stalked by My Doctor franchise, I might’ve
agreed with you, seeing how I have a soft spot in my heart for any and all Part
3’s. However, if you have told me
Stalked by My Doctor: Patient’s Revenge
was going to give me the best single moment of any movie I’ve seen all year, I would’ve
called you batshit crazy. Friends, you
are not batshit crazy. Stalked by My
Doctor: Patient’s Revenge has the best
scene of any movie this year. Forget about
Thanos turning everyone into dust in Infinity War. Wipe your mind of the pop culture Braveheart
battle in Ready Player One. Eradicate the
memory of seeing Han meeting Chewie for the first time in Solo. We have a new numero uno. We have Eric Roberts and Anna Marie Dobbins
performing a La La Land-inspired song and dance number. Just when I think I’ve seen it all, I haven’t.
Yes,
the third act gets a little predictable.
Yes, the final twist is a bit contrived, overly elaborate, and hard to
swallow. Still, how can you not love a
movie that gives you:
and
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