FEMALE WEREWOLF (2015) **

One of the biggest laughs I’ve had lately came approximately one minute into watching Female Werewolf.  The film begins with a long shot of a woman’s face, and I asked myself, “What is this, a Chris Alexander movie?”  When all of a sudden…  BAM!  The title, “A Chris Alexander Film” appeared on screen.  Am I good, or am I good?

You know, it’s been a while since I’ve watched one of Alexander’s uniquely weird, pointlessly arty flicks.  As far as his films go, I can’t say Female Werewolf is one of his best efforts.  However, it may go down smoother if you know what you’re getting yourself into beforehand. 

For example, three minutes into the film, and there’s a long shot of water dripping from a faucet followed by a long shot of a naked chick curled up in the fetal position.  Then, we get a red-tinted slow-motion scene of two chicks making out when… OOPS!  It was all a dream!  It’s that kind of movie.

Anyway, a lonely office worker goes about her mundane existence as she secretly yearns to be with her sexy coworker.  Eventually, she gets up the nerve to invite her to her house and watch TV (it’s broken) before she bites her on the neck and kills her.  Later, she picks up another unwitting victim. 

You’re either the kind of person that digs Alexander’s aesthetic or you aren’t.  I admit that some of his stuff is a little much for me, but when he manages to hit the sweet spot between arty oddity and lowbrow horror, his films work.  Unfortunately for Female Werewolf, the actresses remain clothed during the lesbian sex and dream scenes, which puts a damper on the fun.  Also, I know it’s purposefully slow moving, but there were times I thought my Roku froze up on me because no one was moving and/or nothing was happening.  Alexander’s overuse of super slow motion has a tendency to try your patience too.

You also have to wait a long time before you actually see the werewolf.  Most will be disappointed.  However, I did like the fact that Alexander tried to replicate a Company of Wolves-style werewolf transformation scene with next to no money. 

Even though this is only sixty-five minutes long, it feels twice that length.  Honestly, it could’ve stood to have been a good twenty minutes shorter.  If you’re looking to get into Alexander’s films, I wouldn’t say this is the place to start.  I’d check out Necropolis:  Legion or Parasite Lady first to build up your tolerance level.